Table

Band 6+: The table shows Hollywood female employment positions and changes in 1994 and 2003. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: The table shows Hollywood female employment positions and changes in 1994 and 2003. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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The image depicts a table with three columns and six rows, showcasing the percentage of female employees in different jobs for the years 1994 and 2003, as well as the percentage of change between these years; costume designer: 1994 (74.2%), 2003 (76.1%), change (2.5%); producer: 1994 (15.6%), 2003 (10.3%), change (-34.0%); editor: 1994 (11.4%), 2003 (14.0%), change (22.8%); director: 1994 (5.0%), 2003 (3.0%), change (-40.0%); writer: 1994 (10.0%), 2003 (12.0%), change (20.0%).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The table displays the percentages of different categories of career in female in 1994 and 2003.

Looking at the categories with positive percentage change first, we can see that in 1994 the data of costume designer was 74.2% and then boosted to 76.1% in 2003, representing by a 2.5% gentle percentage increase. Similarly, for the number of producers was 11.4% and then experienced a slightly upturn, resulting a significant percentage change approximately 22.8%. Alternatively, the percentage of female writer was 10% in 1994. It reached 12.0% after 7 years, displayed as 20.0% percentage increase.

On the flip side, with the respect of the categories with negative change, the number of female producer is notable. It was 15.6% in 2003 and then it underwent significantly decline to 10.3% after 7 years, with respect of percentage change of -34.0%. Eventually, the data of directors dropped sharply from 5.0% to 3.0%, showed as 40.0% in percentage decrease.

Overall, we can clearly see that over 7 years the two growths and three diminishes of 5 different careers in terms of female employees.

Word Count: 178

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percentage: 7

female: 4

change: 4

categories: 3

years: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main features of the table and makes relevant comparisons. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g., misreporting data for producers). To improve, ensure all data is accurately represented and consider grouping categories more effectively to enhance clarity and conciseness.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally organized, but the flow could be improved. The introduction is a bit too simple. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs could be smoother. For example, in the first body paragraph, the connection between costume designers and producers isn't immediately clear. Using more varied cohesive devices would enhance the readability.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate but could be more precise and varied. Terms like 'boosted,' 'gentle percentage increase,' 'slightly upturn,' and 'significantly decline' are acceptable but could be replaced with more sophisticated alternatives. For instance, instead of 'boosted,' consider 'increased' or 'rose.' Using a wider range of synonyms would improve the lexical resource.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Some examples include: 'categories of career in female' should be 'categories of female employment'; 'representing by a 2.5% gentle percentage increase' is awkward and could be rephrased as 'representing a modest 2.5% increase'; 'for the number of producers was 11.4%' should be 'the percentage of editors was 11.4%'; 'resulting a significant percentage change approximately 22.8%' should be 'resulting in a percentage change of approximately 22.8%'; 'with the respect of the categories' should be 'with respect to the categories'; 'the number of female producer is notable' should be 'the percentage of female producers is notable'; 'it underwent significantly decline' should be 'it underwent a significant decline'; 'showed as 40.0% in percentage decrease' should be 'showing a 40.0% decrease'. Addressing these errors and focusing on correct sentence structure would improve the grammatical accuracy.

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Band 6+: The table shows Hollywood female employment positions and changes in 1994 and 2003. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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