Letter

Band 5+: write a letter to the MLA of your area in about 120 words suggesting the need for improving existing healthcare facilities and creating more "Wellnes Center" including a specialized hospital for children and woman

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Dear Mr. Ali

I am writing to express my concern about health centers and helping other people with health problems.

First thing that I want to ask is in our location we need better healthcare services, can MLA help with improving existing healthcare centers.

secondly In our spot there were few wellness centers they about two and the behavior of the doctors is also unsatisfactory we need more centers and doctors with experience.

And last thing that I want to ask is establishing a specialized hospital for childeren and woman I am asking that because nowadays hospitals or care services are full of people. There are every kind of people they all mixed In addition women feel discomfort with men its just awkward for women and children.

It would be great to see answer from you.

With respect Aziz.

Word Count: 139

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

centers: 3

people: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses the main points of the task, but the development of each point could be stronger. The language is simple and repetitive in places. To improve, try to provide more specific examples and details to support your suggestions. Also, focus on using a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance the clarity and impact of your writing. The letter falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization is somewhat unclear, and the transitions between ideas could be smoother. Consider using more explicit transition words and phrases to guide the reader through your points. For example, you could use 'Firstly,' 'Secondly,' and 'Finally' to introduce your main concerns more clearly. Additionally, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-defined idea to improve coherence.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks the precision needed to effectively convey your concerns. Try to incorporate more specific and varied vocabulary related to healthcare and community needs. For instance, instead of 'better healthcare services,' you could use 'enhanced healthcare provisions' or 'improved medical infrastructure.' Expanding your vocabulary will help you express your ideas more clearly and persuasively.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Focus on improving sentence structure, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles and prepositions. For example, the sentence 'In our spot there were few wellness centers they about two' needs restructuring for better grammatical accuracy. Reviewing basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction will help improve your accuracy.

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Band 5+: write a letter to the MLA of your area in about 120 words suggesting the need for improving existing healthcare facilities and creating more "Wellnes Center" including a specialized hospital for children and woman

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

write a letter to the MLA of your area in about 120 words suggesting the need for improving existing healthcare facilities and creating more “Wellnes Center” including a specialized hospital for children and woman

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