Letter

Band 5+: You are going on a short training course at a collage in Greenmount, Northern Ireland. You need somewhere to live while you are there. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In your letter, • explain your situation • describe the accommodation you require • say when you will need it

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Dear Officer,

i hope this letter finds you well.

My name is jack and i am a student of final year B-com studey in accounts specialist,

upcomeing september i have a small training course for my carrear path way at your campus in New Zealand. so for that i need a quarters to staying at coupal of months. I already search for a palce to stay near the univercity, but it was out of my budget, it is so expensive. After that my friends advice to check callege website look for a room for period of some times and its available, also rent in my pocket.

Before i confirm the room i have some requirment , Firstely i am a vegiterian person fo my shering room met i want same like me or give me a singel room, secoundly if its possible get acceces of the collage libreary for my training releted study .

i hop you fullfeel my acpectation and looking forward hear from you.

thank you in advance

your sincerely

jack

Word Count: 173

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The letter addresses the task requirements by explaining the situation and describing accommodation needs. However, the letter contains some irrelevant information and inaccuracies. For example, the details about searching for accommodation outside the university are not directly relevant to the request. The letter also contains grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, which affect clarity. To improve, focus on providing concise and relevant information directly related to the accommodation request. Proofread carefully to correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structure.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization is somewhat unclear, and the flow of ideas could be improved. Consider using more explicit transitions between your explanation of the situation, your accommodation requirements, and your additional requests. Paragraphing could be more effective in separating distinct topics. For example, the reason for writing, accommodation needs, and additional requests could each form separate paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and sometimes inaccurate ('quarters to staying at coupal of months,' 'shering room met'). Expanding your range of vocabulary and ensuring accuracy would enhance the clarity and impact of your letter. For example, instead of 'quarters to staying at coupal of months,' you could say 'accommodation for a couple of months.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical errors throughout the letter, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and punctuation mistakes. For example, 'i am a student of final year B-com studey' should be 'I am a final year B.Com student.' Focus on using a wider range of sentence structures and ensuring grammatical accuracy to improve the overall quality of your writing. Proofreading carefully before submitting is essential.

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