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Letter

Band 4+: You have learned about an international job that is available within the company you currently work for and you want to apply. Write a letter to the hiring manager. In your letter Say why you are applying for this international position Describe the job you are currently doing for the company Tell him/her why you think you will be good at the job

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear Sir/madam,

I am writing this letter regarding the position of safety manager at Chicago head office.I have been working as safety manager at Saskatoon location since past 2 years.My parents are retried now and residing at Chicago.Therefore,I am planning to move there. I would highly appreciate if you consider my application for the position.

Briefing about my current work experience,I perform safety inspection at regional level and identify the safety hazards.I analyze and make sure that location area and workers receive safe environment.Also,I perform with company’s safety procedure and policies and advice necessary changes for it.I closely work for the training process and reports to my regional managers.Additionally,My current location is as large as Chicago location in terms of employees ,it would be beneficial for implying workplace safety.

I would be the great fit for the position as I have the required work experience, Skills and knowledge. I am aware of how Chicago location operates, as I am in touch with the others employees who are actively working there.However,I do need to revise the minor changes in safety procedure which have been made recently for all the USA locations.

Feel free to reach out to me if you need more information.

Yours faithfully,

Dhvani

Word Count: 205

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Overall Band Score

4.5
(+/- 0.5)
Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.
Grammar Mistakes: N/A
Vocabulary Repetition:
safety: 6
location: 5
chicago: 3
would: 3
Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

6
The letter adequately addresses the task by explaining why the applicant is applying for the international position, describing the current job role, and stating why they believe they are suitable for the new position. However, some parts could be more detailed to fully meet the task requirements.

Coherence & Cohesion

4
The letter is mostly coherent and cohesive, with ideas presented in a logical order. However, there are some minor lapses in cohesion, such as abrupt transitions between paragraphs. Consider using linking words to improve the flow of ideas.

Lexical Resource

4
There is a good range of vocabulary used throughout the letter. However, some words could be more precise, and a few awkward phrases are present. Try to use more sophisticated vocabulary to enhance the overall lexical resource.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4
The letter demonstrates a variety of sentence structures, but there are some grammatical errors present, such as subject-verb agreement issues and punctuation errors. Proofreading for these mistakes is recommended to improve accuracy.

Answers On The Same Topic:

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