Letter

Band 9: You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

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Dear Sir or Madam,

I am one of your customers, and I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with the laptop I purchased from your shop in Mansoura city last week.

To begin with, as a program engineer, I had been keen to buy a breakthrough laptop to be able to process huge data required in my projects. Therefore, I bought the latest version of an HP laptop from your downtown branch, and it has been working properly for three days.

However, later on its speed of processing has gradually declined; moreover, I noticed that it became hot whenever I used it. Finally, today, it has stopped working completely, displaying a fixed blue screen showing an illogical error.

I would appreciate it if you could replace the faulty laptop with a brand new one without additional cost. If a replacement is not available, I would like to receive a full refund, I can provide the receipt and the warranty details if required.

Yours faithfully,

Ahmed

Word Count: 165

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

laptop: 4

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Task Response

The letter fully addresses all three bullet points in the task: it clearly describes the equipment (an HP laptop), explains the problem (gradual decline in speed, overheating, and finally a blue screen), and states the desired action (replacement or refund). The tone is appropriate and formal, and the letter is well-structured with a clear purpose. Minor details, such as the specific location of the shop, do not detract from the overall effectiveness. The letter is concise, relevant, and meets all requirements at a high level.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is logically organized and easy to follow. Each paragraph has a clear purpose: introduction, description of the equipment and problem, and request for action. Cohesive devices (e.g., 'To begin with', 'However', 'Finally', 'Moreover') are used effectively and naturally. Paragraphing is well managed, with a clear separation of ideas. No lapses in coherence or cohesion.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is precise and varied, with natural and sophisticated control. Phrases like 'express my dissatisfaction', 'breakthrough laptop', 'processing huge data', 'gradually declined', 'displaying a fixed blue screen', and 'illogical error' demonstrate a wide range of appropriate lexical items. The tone is formal and appropriate for the task. No errors in word choice or collocation.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter demonstrates a wide range of grammatical structures used with full flexibility and control. Complex sentences are handled accurately (e.g., 'I had been keen to buy...', 'I would appreciate it if you could...'). Punctuation is correct throughout, and there are no grammar errors. The grammar checker confirms virtually no issues, and the letter reads naturally and fluently.

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You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

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Band 9

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Band 9: You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

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you give advice to your friend who is seeking work. write a letter advising your friend about a job. tell your friend which job it is and explain why you think it is suitable job. advise your friend about application process

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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