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Letter

Band 8+: You recently bought an item online. When it was delivered you found that the item did not work correctly. Write a letter to the manager of the company. In your letter: • Describe the item and the problem with it • Explain why the item is important for you • Say what you want the manager to do. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to register my displeasure about a faulty PC that I recently purchased via your online store.

I ordered a silver-colored HP Envy PC with 16 GB RAM and 512 GB storage space. However, when I received the laptop, to my dismay, it took 2 hours to completely boot from putting it on to the Windows page, which is rather unexpected for a 16 GB RAM laptop. Furthermore, the camera is damaged, and the screen has multiple lines across it.

This laptop is extremely important for my daily activities, as I work with a video-editing company, and my job requires that I turn out timely, high-quality videos frequently. This is rather difficult with a slow laptop and damaged screen. Also, I am required to attend online meetings every weekday, and this is not possible if the camera of my laptop is faulty.

Therefore, I would like to request for the laptop to be changed to a fully functioning one with no faults. Alternatively, a refund could be processed if replacing the laptop seems difficult.

I would be grateful if this problem could be resolved as soon as possible.

Yours faithfully,

Oluwafemi Agboola

Word Count: 198

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Overall Band Score

8.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

laptop: 7

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

9

The letter appropriately satisfies the requirements of the task. The description of the item and its problems is clear, the explanation of its importance is well-articulated, and the desired actions are explicitly stated. The tone is professional and the language is accurate.

Coherence & Cohesion

8

The letter is well-organized and easy to follow. The progression of ideas is logical, and the use of cohesive devices is generally effective. Minor improvements could be made to enhance the flow between certain sentences, but overall, the coherence and cohesion are strong.

Lexical Resource

8

A good range of vocabulary is used appropriately. The language is sufficiently precise for the task. Consider exploring more sophisticated vocabulary related to technology or customer service to further enhance the lexical resource.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

8

The letter demonstrates a strong command of grammar with a wide range of structures used accurately and effectively. Punctuation is also handled well. The few errors present do not detract from the overall clarity and quality of the writing.

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