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Letter

Band 6+: You work in a busy but poorly organized office and you are keen to be promoted. Your employer needs to find a new supervisor for your department. Write a letter to your employer. In the letter • Ask to be considered for this job • Explain why you would be a suitable candidate • Outline the current problems and the changes you would like to make

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear Mr. Walters,

I am writing to express my keen interest in the new opening for the role of supervisor in the Sales Department.

It has now been three years since I joined the Sales Department of this organization. I have gained a plentiful experience under the leadership of previous supervisor, Mr. Tim. Also, I am the senior most employee after Mr. Tim.

I consider myself suitable for this role because I have the knowledge, experience and skills required for the responsibilities of this role. I am also familiar with all the challenges that our department is facing.

The system that we are providing our clients with, is considered to be outdated by some industry experts. Furthermore, I have also worked with most of our clients side representatives and I can say that I am aware of all their needs and respective requirements.

Apart from the reasons listed above, I have the utmost interest in the field of sales and I consider myself a suitable candidate for the role of supervisor.

Yours Faithfully,

Abhay Arora

Word Count: 175

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

sales: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

7

The letter adequately addresses the task by expressing interest, highlighting suitability, and outlining some problems. However, it could benefit from a more detailed explanation of proposed changes and a stronger demonstration of leadership qualities.

Coherence & Cohesion

6

The letter's structure is logical, but the flow could be improved by better connecting ideas and providing more transitional phrases. Some points feel a bit disjointed.

Lexical Resource

6.5

The vocabulary used is appropriate and mostly accurate, showing a good range of words. More precise and impactful language could elevate the letter's overall effect.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

5.5

While the grammar is largely correct, there are a few errors that affect the overall clarity and flow. Improving grammatical accuracy will enhance the letter's professionalism.

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