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Letter

Band 6+: You would like a job working in a summer camp which runs sports and outdoor activities for children and young people. Write a letter to the organiser of the summer camp. In your letter: describe your personality say what relevant experience and skills you have *explain what sort of work you would like to do

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear Sir! Madam,

I am writing to express my interest in the available positions at your summer camp, particularly the role of cook as advertised in the newspaper. I am enthusiastic about contributing to this summer with my skills.

I consider myself a dedicated person with a passion for culinary arts. I am hard-working and responsible person which are essential for maintaining high standards in kitchen, and I am able to work in fast-paced environment to finish my tasks on time.

I hold a two-year diploma in culinary management from Seneca College, Toronto and I have hands-on experience of four years in various food establishments. I have experience of preparing a diverse range of cuisines including Chinese, Mexican and Indian dishes.

I can prepare nutritious meals for children. Additionally, I have food handler certificate to ensure food safety standards which is recognized by all over the world.

Thank you for considering my application to this role. I look forward to hearing from you on a favorable response about my application.

Yours truly,

Prabh

Word Count: 173

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Overall Band Score

6

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

6

The letter adequately addresses the task by expressing interest in a summer camp position and providing relevant information. However, it focuses solely on a cook position, neglecting other aspects of the task, such as describing personality and preferred work type beyond cooking.

Coherence & Cohesion

6

The letter's structure is logical, with paragraphs dedicated to different aspects of the application. However, the flow could be improved by using smoother transitions between ideas and ensuring better cohesion between sentences.

Lexical Resource

6.5

The letter demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary related to cooking and work experience. While the language is generally clear, more precise and varied vocabulary could enhance the overall impact.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4.5

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect the overall clarity and fluency. Improving grammatical accuracy is crucial for enhancing the overall quality of the writing.

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