Letter

Band 6+: Your company is hosting an annual charity event, and you're tasked with inviting local business owners to participate. Write a letter to a local business owner inviting them to the event. You should include details about: - the purpose of the charity event and the cause it supports - the date, time, and location of the event, along with any featured activities - how their participation will benefit the charity and provide exposure for their business

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Dear Sir,

Im writing this letter inform you about the community event I will organize to raise money for a local charity,and I would like to request a donation and a sponsorship from you.

To start off, the event will be as follows,for every kilometer covered by people enrolled in the marathon,1 Saudi Riyal is raised. Since many people are enrolled,I am finding it hard to provide the necessary safety equipment,snacks and water. A donation from your side would asisst me in financially funding this event.

Moreover,I am finding it hard to gather volunteers to guide participants, and I believe an announcment from your side would inspire people to come and help. To acknowledge your contribution,your name will be included in the list of people who helped managing such an event,with the mean of help you gave away also mentioned!Not only that,but everyone contributing will recieve an award .

I hope that you accept my request .

Best regards,

Mahmoud

Word Count: 160

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 4

would: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter covers all three required points: it describes the event (a marathon) and its purpose (raising money for a local charity), explains how the business's support would help (funding safety equipment, snacks, water, and attracting volunteers), and outlines acknowledgment (name in the list of contributors and an award). The tone is appropriate and the structure is clear. However, there are some lapses: the purpose of the charity is not specified, the link between the business's announcement and volunteer recruitment could be clearer, and the acknowledgment could be more specific (e.g., mentioning the business name in promotional materials). To improve, provide more detail on the charity's cause, explain how the sponsorship would benefit the business (e.g., positive publicity), and make the acknowledgment more concrete and professional.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is logically organized into paragraphs, and the overall message is clear. However, there are some issues with cohesion, such as abrupt transitions and a lack of linking words. For example, the second paragraph starts with 'To start off' but then moves to a different point without a clear connector. The final paragraph is very brief and could be better integrated. To improve, use a wider range of cohesive devices (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'In addition', 'As a result') and ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic with smooth connections between sentences.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is generally appropriate for the task, with some good attempts at formal language (e.g., 'request a donation', 'acknowledge your contribution'). However, there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'asisst' for 'assist', 'announcment' for 'announcement', 'recieve' for 'receive') and some awkward phrasing (e.g., 'with the mean of help you gave away also mentioned'). To improve, use more precise and varied vocabulary, and proofread for spelling. Consider using phrases like 'financial support', 'in-kind contribution', 'public recognition' to enhance lexical range.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains a number of grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'Im writing this letter inform you' should be 'I am writing this letter to inform you', and 'I will organize' should be 'I am organizing' or 'I will be organizing'. There are also issues with punctuation, such as missing commas and run-on sentences (e.g., '...also mentioned!Not only that...'). The range of sentence structures is limited, with many simple sentences. To improve, practice using a variety of complex structures (e.g., conditional sentences, relative clauses) and ensure subject-verb agreement and correct use of articles. Proofreading for punctuation and grammar is essential.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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