Opinion

Band 5+: employers should give its staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to make employees better at their jobs. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, there is a widespread claim that employes should provide a minimum of four weeks’ holiday each year to increase productivity and best results at work. While there are some consequences of this trend, I totally agree with this statement for several key reasons.

Firstly, a small holiday between a year always bears recovery and relaxation of work. Employers can find themselves in burnout after a long workhour, dedicating all their forces to a certain task. So, to prevent a burnout and bad perfomance at their workplace , bosses need to think carefully of their stuff with giving a break of work. For example, the head of department can control how qualified staff fulfil their tasks, along with that notice who cannot do work properly anymore. As a result, those who were seemed as a bad performances will be suspended from work for several weeks.

Secondly , if employees give more holidays to their staff, it will increase time dedicating to employers family and householding. In general, when a person has organized household and good relationships with their relatives, it is usually lead to the beneficial effect on work. Moreover, it makes a clear mind and enhance mood if all aspects of well-being is included. For instance, when my mom is frustrated and do not have a positive specter of emotions, she does not want to do anything which is relying on her work.

In conclusion, I believe that employees will increase the number of hours on relaxation for the best performance of their workers. For this reason it will prevent a burnout of employers and at the same time they are going to have more free hours for their strong connections between family members.

Word Count: 285

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

their: 8

increase: 3

employers: 3

burnout: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear position. The ideas are relevant but could benefit from more precise support and development. For instance, the examples provided could be more specific and directly linked to the main points. To improve, focus on elaborating on your ideas with more concrete examples and evidence, and ensure each paragraph has a clear focus.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates some organization, but the progression of ideas is not always clear. Paragraphing is present, but the connections between sentences and paragraphs could be strengthened to improve the flow of the argument. The use of cohesive devices is limited, and at times, transitions are abrupt. To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly. Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that all sentences within the paragraph relate to that topic. Also, consider the overall structure of your essay and how each paragraph contributes to your argument.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary, and there are instances of inaccurate word choice. While the vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, it lacks precision and sophistication. To enhance lexical resource, try to incorporate a wider variety of vocabulary related to the topic. Pay attention to the nuances of meaning and use synonyms to avoid repetition. Also, focus on using collocations and idiomatic expressions appropriately to demonstrate a more natural command of the language. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains a number of grammatical errors, including issues with verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. These errors sometimes impede understanding. While a range of structures is attempted, control is inconsistent. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on reviewing basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction. Pay attention to common errors and proofread carefully to identify and correct mistakes. Consider using a grammar checker to help identify areas for improvement, but always review the suggestions critically.

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Band 5+: employers should give its staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to make employees better at their jobs. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

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employers should give its staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to make employees better at their jobs. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

employers should give its staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to make employees better at their jobs. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

employers should give its staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to make employees better at their jobs. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

employers should give its staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to make employees better at their jobs. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

employers should give its staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to make employees better at their jobs. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

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