Discussion

Band 7+: Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

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Having more money and less free time is better for some people than having less money and more free time. But for others it is absolutely opposite.

Having more money and less free time or having less money and more free time are two different possible points in life. And everyone has their own perspective on their vision of life.

If you have more money and less free time, you will probably have more fun, respect, power, luxury and wealth in general and of course you will not have a boring lifestyle. But there is the opposite view on this. You will not have an opportunity to be with your family members as long as people usually are, you might not have enough time to see many beautiful places that our Earth has and maybe you will not be 100% happy because of the short life that you have.

But on the other hand, if you choose to have less money and more free time, it will be completely different. The way of living your life will be a little bit more boring than the first option. You will not be able to afford a lot of expensive and cool things, you will live a normal life as a bigger part of people do, you will not have that many opportunities to buy something that you like and probably you will not have a lot of fun, happiness and power. But you will be able to experience every stage of growing up, you will get enough time for your lovers and family and you might be more intelligent and wise.

Both options are interesting and sound great. However, for me, I think it is better to have less money and more free time. My main reason is that I will be able to have experience. Also I am a sensitive person, so for me it is significantly important to have relationships with other people, and if I get more time for this, I will be absolutely happy. Even though I also would love to have a lot of money.

Word Count: 349

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

money: 8

people: 4

having: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt by discussing both views and stating an opinion. However, the development of ideas lacks depth and precision. The arguments are somewhat repetitive and could be more clearly supported with specific examples or reasoning. To improve, focus on extending each point with concrete illustrations and ensure a more balanced discussion of both views before presenting your opinion.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay is generally well-organized and easy to follow. The introduction clearly presents the two views, and each body paragraph discusses one side. The conclusion states your opinion. However, the flow could be improved by using more cohesive devices (e.g., 'in contrast,' 'furthermore') to link ideas within and between paragraphs. The paragraphing is adequate but could be more skillfully managed to enhance clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is appropriate and varied, with some good phrases like 'absolutely opposite,' 'different possible points in life,' and 'experience every stage of growing up.' There is a natural use of words such as 'luxury,' 'power,' and 'wise.' To reach a higher score, aim for more sophisticated and precise vocabulary (e.g., 'financial security' instead of 'more money,' 'leisure time' instead of 'free time') and avoid repetition (e.g., 'boring' used multiple times). Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The grammar is largely accurate, with a good range of sentence structures, including complex sentences (e.g., 'If you have more money... you will probably have...'). There are no major errors, and punctuation is used correctly. Minor issues include a missing comma after 'But for others' in the first paragraph and the phrase 'the opposite view on this' could be more natural. Overall, the grammar is strong and supports clear communication.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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