Opinion

Band 6+: It is often said that governments spend too much money on projects to protect wildlife, while there are other problems that are more important? Do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, many people believe that governments spend too much money on protecting wildlife, while more serious problems need attention. In my opinion, I partly agree with this statement because human problems are very important, but wildlife protection should not be ignored.

Firstly, governments should spend more money on essential areas such as education, healthcare and poverty. In many countries, people still suffer from poor medical services, unemployment and low-quality schools. If governments use more money to solve these problems, people’s living standards will improve. For example, building modern hospitals and schools can directly help society.

In other hand, wildlife protection is also important for the future of our planet. Animals and plants are part of the natural balance. If some species disappear, it may damage the environment and create serious problems for people as well. Therefore, governments should not completely stop supporting wildlife projects.

In conclusion, I believe that governments should give priority to human problems, but they should also spend a reasonable amount of money on wildlife protection. A balanced approach is the best solution.

Word Count: 176

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

governments: 5

wildlife: 5

problems: 5

should: 5

money: 4

people: 3

spend: 3

protection: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear position. The main ideas are relevant, but there could be more focus and precision in supporting them. To improve, provide more specific examples and develop the arguments more fully. For instance, elaborate on the potential environmental damage caused by species extinction and how it directly affects humans. Also, consider discussing the long-term benefits of wildlife protection, such as ecotourism and scientific research. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay presents a clear position and maintains it throughout. The arguments are logically organized, and paragraphing is generally effective. Transitions between paragraphs could be smoother to enhance the flow of ideas. For instance, the transition into the 'other hand' paragraph could be more nuanced to better connect it to the preceding argument.

Lexical Resource

The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary to express ideas clearly. However, the language used is somewhat basic and could benefit from more sophisticated word choices and idiomatic expressions. Consider using synonyms and more precise vocabulary to elevate the writing. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay demonstrates a good command of grammar with only minor errors. Sentence structures are varied, and punctuation is generally accurate. To further improve, focus on refining sentence construction for greater precision and impact.

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