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Band 5+: Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such thing as food and education? Or is It the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

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In my personal opinion, I think that rich or developed country should help the under development or poor country to fulfill their basic needs.

We all are social being so, it is our duty to make a peaceful and a world with equity.In our world there are many country whom have a lot of money in their reserve section.In contrast, there are also some neglected and poor country who can not ensure their basic needs like Foods, Education, Health care and others. So, being a rich nation it is our duty to fulfill their needs according to our capabilities. If all stable country try to help the unstable country then we can make a stable world and fulfill their needs from flip-flops to health care. For having a stable world many organization also working dawn to dusk

There are many rules and regulations to run a country. so that, if the national government can not do whatever they want. For this reason they need foreign loans or other support as well. Local government can use the money on exact place and think to improve their status. For example: Bangladesh have many contract with China and Japan to make Hospitals, Bridges and fulfill other basic fundamental needs of our country.

For making a world without discrimination, we should give our hand of help to pull them out from it. It is not fairly possible for them to come over by their own. so, I believe that foreign help is mandatory to fulfill all fundamental needs for the poor country.

Word Count: 258

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

country: 8

their: 7

fulfill: 5

world: 5

needs: 5

basic: 3

stable: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt and presents a position. However, the ideas lack clarity and could be more developed. To improve, focus on providing more specific examples and elaborating on the reasoning behind your claims. Also, ensure that your arguments are logically structured and easy to follow.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay's organization is somewhat unclear, and the progression of ideas could be smoother. Paragraphing is present but could be used more effectively to separate distinct points. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are often weak or missing, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. To improve coherence, focus on creating clearer topic sentences for each paragraph and using transition words to connect ideas logically. For example, use phrases like 'Furthermore,' 'In addition,' 'However,' or 'Therefore' to signal the relationship between different points.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is quite basic and repetitive, which limits the essay's ability to express complex ideas effectively. There is a lack of precision in word choice, and some words are used inappropriately. To enhance lexical resource, try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to the topic of wealth distribution and international aid. Use a thesaurus to find synonyms for common words and phrases, and pay attention to the specific connotations of different words to ensure they are used accurately. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'help,' consider alternatives like 'support,' 'assist,' 'aid,' or 'empower.' Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. These errors frequently impede understanding and detract from the overall quality of the writing. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction. Review the rules for verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles and prepositions. Consider using online grammar checkers or seeking feedback from a tutor to identify and correct errors in your writing.

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Band 5+: Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such thing as food and education? Or is It the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Essays On The Same Topic:

Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such thing as food and education? Or is It the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such thing as food and education? Or is It the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such thing as food and education? Or is It the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Other Topics:

In many countries, advertising aimed at children has become increasingly common through social media, video platforms, and online games. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

ome people say that large companies should provide sport and social facilities for local communities. To what exent do you agree or disagree with this view

Cultural differences between nations are becoming less distinct as people worldwide now watch the same movies, adopt similar fashion styles, and are exposed to the same brands, advertisements, and TV programs. Are the benefits of this change greater than the drawbacks?

Tourism brings economic benefits but also causes damage to local cultures and the environment. Do the advantages of tourism outweigh the disadvantages?

The qualities and skills that a person requires to become successful in today's world cannot be learned at a university or any other academic institution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Large supermarkets will be a death of small, local shops. Do you agree?

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample With Your Idea?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Essays On The Same Topic:

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