Opinion

Band 4+: Some people say that the main aim of advertising is to improve sales of products that people do not really need. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In the recent times, people usually know the existence of product by advertisement that are shown in many gadgets auch as phone, pads’, television and etc. It is assumed that the marketers or and influencers, advertising the products which is people do not need previously, to only regch the top and develop their sales. I totally agree with this statement.

Firstly, advertising frequently suppor people to buy items that do not needed genuinely. Companies often provide luxury things, like the latest smartphones, fashionable clothes. As an example, at the end of the 2025, Apple… company introduced “iPhone Pocket” which seems unnecessary, but people still buy it under the influence of advertising. Therefore, people spend money on the products that not significantly improve their lives.

Secondly, advertisements is often appeal to emotions instead of logic. People relate the products with happiness, success and popularity. Social media is also playing. significant role. For example, many influencers are promoting item that are the “latest trend” or like more fashionable but, not essential. In consequence, potential customers, especially young people feel pleasure to buy these product in order to fit in and feel more confident.

Word Count: 191

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 7

advertising: 3

products: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt and presents a position. The main ideas are relevant but could benefit from more clarity and development. To improve, focus on providing more specific examples and elaborating on the reasoning behind your claims. Consider exploring counterarguments or alternative perspectives to demonstrate a more nuanced understanding of the topic. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates some attempt at organization, but the ideas are not always clearly linked, and the progression can be difficult to follow. Paragraphing is present but could be more effectively used to separate and develop distinct points. Transitions between sentences and ideas need improvement to enhance the flow of the essay.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat limited, and there are instances of inaccurate word choice. To improve, focus on expanding your vocabulary and using more precise language to convey your ideas. Pay attention to collocations and the appropriate use of words in context.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. These errors impede understanding and affect the overall clarity of the writing. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence construction. Proofreading carefully for errors is essential.

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Band 4+: Some people say that the main aim of advertising is to improve sales of products that people do not really need. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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Some people say that the main aim of advertising is to improve sales of products that people do not really need. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the main aim of advertising is to improve sales of products that people do not really need. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the main aim of advertising is to improve sales of products that people do not really need. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the main aim of advertising is to improve sales of products that people do not really need. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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