Positive And Negative

Band 4+: These days, people spend a large amount of money on their physical appearance. Why do people do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

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Nowadays,most of people purchase expensive beauty product or get treatment to look younger.They are follow the trend and social media influencer.I think it might be useful for development to look younger for advertisement or it may worried because people gets tensed or dipressive.

Firstly,In today’s people lost of money expenses on purchase expensive beauty products and do skin care treatment for gets look younger and smart. Furthermore baeuty creams like a anti aging cream and many people are doing surgery they help to look fit and slim.however,they follow the trend and influence by social media influencer.moreover, looking not older or skin problem issues many solutions are available in the market.sometimes people wear a branded clothes to define the personality.

On the other hand,today’s most of the people worried about their financial issues so they can not afford costly skin care product or skin surgery.However this is the bad impact in generation everyone try to look younger but their can not be done due to their other expenses. I think this trend to use expensive mobile,luxury car and wear branded clothing is very stressful or dispressive for middle class people.Although,everyone is busy to show up and everyone is try to look richer.

In conclusion,in my opinion both the point have their own benefits.purchase depend on the financial status.Excessive use of beauty creams they are might be damaged skin.I think people doing expenses money according to their financial status.If people are capable to purchase a luxury car they did but if not so not going with trend and makes their life in trouble.

Word Count: 261

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 8

their: 6

trend: 4

purchase: 3

expensive: 3

beauty: 3

think: 3

younger: 3

expenses: 3

financial: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt by discussing why people spend money on appearance to look younger and attempts to present a position on whether this is positive or negative. However, the development of ideas is limited and not always clear. There are issues with grammar, vocabulary, and sentence structure that affect clarity. The position is discernible but lacks consistent support and logical progression. To improve, focus on organizing ideas more coherently, using clearer language, and providing specific examples or reasons to support your points. Also, proofread to correct grammatical errors and improve overall readability.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay attempts to address the topic but lacks a clear and logical structure. The introduction presents both sides but is confusing. Paragraphs are not well-developed, and ideas are often jumbled. The use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes incorrect (e.g., 'Firstly', 'On the other hand', 'However'). The conclusion is weak and does not effectively summarize the arguments. To improve, create a clear outline before writing, with a distinct introduction, body paragraphs each focusing on one main idea, and a strong conclusion. Use linking words appropriately to show relationships between ideas.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, with frequent errors in word choice and collocation (e.g., 'lost of money expenses', 'gets tensed or dipressive', 'bad impact in generation'). There is an attempt to use some topic-related terms (e.g., 'beauty products', 'anti aging cream', 'skin surgery'), but they are not used accurately. To improve, expand your vocabulary by reading more on common IELTS topics, and practice using new words in context. Focus on correct collocations and avoid direct translations from your native language. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors that impede understanding. These include subject-verb agreement errors ('people purchase... They are follow'), incorrect verb forms ('for gets look younger'), missing articles ('most of people'), and punctuation issues (missing commas, run-on sentences). Sentence structures are mostly simple and often incorrect. To improve, review basic grammar rules, especially verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. Practice writing simple, correct sentences before attempting complex structures. Proofread your work carefully.

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Band 4+: These days, people spend a large amount of money on their physical appearance. Why do people do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

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These days, people spend a large amount of money on their physical appearance. Why do people do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

These days, people spend a large amount of money on their physical appearance. Why do people do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

These days, people spend a large amount of money on their physical appearance. Why do people do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

These days, people spend a large amount of money on their physical appearance. Why do people do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

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Some organizations believe that their employee should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some organizations believe that their employee should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that the environment may be destroyed because of tourism. Others, however, believe that it is a way to preserve nature. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The movement of people from agriculture areas to big cites has caused many problems at both places. What are the reasons for this problem? How can it be solved?

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

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