Pie Chart

Band 4+: Various Career and Academic Choices Taken by High School Graduates in Lakeside County in 2010 and 2020

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The image displays two pie charts comparing various career and academic choices taken by high school graduates in Lakeside County in 2010 and 2020. In 2010, the majority, 55%, had no idea, followed by 24% working and 11% going to college, 5% each working in freelance and informal sectors, and starting a business. In 2020, 38% were going to college, 24% working, 15% no idea, 13% starting a business, 10% working in freelance and informal sectors.

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The pie charts illustrate various career and academic choices taken by high school graduates in in Lakeside country in 2010 and 2020.

Overall,there are two charts that gives information about choises of graduates and there are five types of choices such as no idea,working,starting a business,working and going to college.In addition,there are diffrent percantage between two years that shows the future of graduates.

Looking at details,in 2010 a large number of students was goals and due to that fact just 5 percent learners was not idea while after ten years in incrased for ten percent.In contrast 2010,in 2020 the percantage of woking graduates smaller by 14 percent.However,in 2020 the numbers of individuals that want to poen business grew apprroximately for 20 percent.As,a result,the number of graduates that went to college was declined for around the twenty pecent that leads to individuals without degree of education centry.So,the last one it is working in freelance and information sectors that almost did not change.

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Overall Band Score

4.5

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Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

graduates: 4

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Task Response

The report addresses the task and provides some relevant information from the pie charts, but it includes some inaccuracies and lacks detail in certain areas. The organization is somewhat clear, but the language contains errors that affect clarity. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data, providing more specific details, and ensuring grammatical correctness.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and logical flow. The introduction is weak, and the overview is not well-defined. The body paragraphs jump between different data points without a clear structure, making it difficult to follow the comparisons between 2010 and 2020. Use cohesive devices more effectively to link ideas and create a smoother transition between sentences. Consider organizing the report by focusing on specific trends or categories of choices and comparing their changes over the decade.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive. There is a lack of precision in describing the data, and some word choices are not entirely appropriate ('learners was not idea,' 'poen business,' 'degree of education centry'). Expand your vocabulary related to describing trends, proportions, and changes. Use synonyms to avoid repetition and improve the overall sophistication of the language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. There are also issues with punctuation and spelling. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence construction. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors before submitting your work.

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