Bar Chart

Band 4+: the graph below gives the result of a survey showing what 1.000 young people did after leaving school between 2008 and 2012 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparasions where relevant

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Image for topic: the graph below gives the result of a survey showing what 1.000 young people did after leaving school between 2008 and 2012 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparasions where relevant

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The image presents a bar graph detailing the post-school activities of 1,000 young individuals from 2008 to 2012, segmented into three main categories: "Went to university," "Looked for work," and "Took a temporary break from education." In 2008, the respective values were approximately: university - 440, work - 350, break - 210. In 2009: university - 350, work - 450, break - 200. In 2010: university - 400, work - 350, break - 250. In 2011: university - 360, work - 410, break - 230. In 2012: university - 380, work - 370, break - 250.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The bar chart demonstrates data on the consequences of a survey showing what a million of adults did after graduating school from 2008 to 2012.

Overall, it is evident that there are not difference between looked for work and went to university Furthermore, looked for work is the biggest one, it was clear between other categories.

Examining the details, took a temporary break from education recorded the lowest value at 300% among young people, while went to university stood at approximately 400% as looked for work in 2011, however it decreased at 300 % at the end of the term. Likewise, took a temporary break from education slightly higher than went to university in the second term.

By contrast, looked for work accounted for a much higher proportion. Meanwhile, took a temporary break from education took a moderate figure compared to the others between 2010 and 2011.

Word Count: 147

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

looked: 4

between: 3

university: 3

temporary: 3

break: 3

education: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains significant inaccuracies that hinder the clarity of the data presentation. Most notably, the use of percentages (e.g., '300%', '400%') is incorrect, as the data represents a count of individuals out of 1,000, not percentages. Additionally, the overview and body paragraphs contain contradictory statements and unclear comparisons, such as claiming there is 'no difference' between categories while simultaneously stating one is the 'biggest.' To improve, ensure that data units are used correctly, focus on making logical comparisons between the trends, and ensure that the overview provides a clear, accurate summary of the main trends observed in the graph. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The organization of the report is somewhat disjointed, making it difficult for the reader to follow the trends. While there is an attempt to use cohesive devices (e.g., 'Overall', 'By contrast', 'Meanwhile'), they are often used incorrectly or do not logically connect the ideas presented. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that transitions between sentences logically support the comparison of data. Avoid starting sentences with 'Likewise' or 'Meanwhile' unless they truly establish a relationship between the preceding and following information.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is limited and often inaccurate. For example, using 'consequences' to describe survey results is inappropriate, and 'a million of adults' is a significant factual error regarding the scale of the data. There is also a misuse of percentage symbols (e.g., '300%'), which misrepresents the nature of the data provided. To improve, focus on learning precise academic verbs for describing trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'remained steady', 'peaked') and ensure that nouns and adjectives are used in the correct context.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and significantly impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'there are not difference'), sentence structure (run-on sentences), and the use of articles. The report also struggles with comparative structures (e.g., 'it was clear between other categories'). To improve, practice constructing simple and complex sentences with correct agreement and focus on using comparative and superlative forms accurately to describe differences in data.

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Band 4+: the graph below gives the result of a survey showing what 1.000 young people did after leaving school between 2008 and 2012 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparasions where relevant

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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the graph below gives the result of a survey showing what 1.000 young people did after leaving school between 2008 and 2012 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparasions where relevant

the graph below gives the result of a survey showing what 1.000 young people did after leaving school between 2008 and 2012 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparasions where relevant

the graph below gives the result of a survey showing what 1.000 young people did after leaving school between 2008 and 2012 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparasions where relevant

the graph below gives the result of a survey showing what 1.000 young people did after leaving school between 2008 and 2012 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparasions where relevant

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