Line Graph

Band 5+: Task 1: The graph below shows the percentage of secondary school teachers under 30 years of age in four countries between 2010 and 2017. Provide an overview of the information by identifying and describing the key details, and include comparisons where appropriate.

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Image for topic: Task 1: The graph below shows the percentage of secondary school teachers under 30 years of age in four countries between 2010 and 2017. Provide an overview of the information by identifying and describing the key details, and include comparisons where appropriate.

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The image contains a line graph showing the percentage of secondary school teachers under 30 in four countries from 2010 to 2017. The data is as follows: Brazil started at 5.5% in 2010, then 9.8% (2011), 9.5% (2012), 6.8% (2013), 8.5% (2014), 5.8% (2015), 5.5% (2016), and ended at 6.5% (2017). Luxembourg's figures were 18.5% (2010), 14.2% (2011), 15.8% (2012), 12.5% (2013), 11% (2014), 10.5% (2015), 10% (2016), and 10% (2017). Japan's percentages were 9% (2010), 11% (2011), 10.8% (2012), 10.8% (2013), 14% (2014), 14.2% (2015), 15% (2016), and 15.5% (2017). The Czech Republic's data was 20% (2010), 18.5% (2011), 18% (2012), 17.5% (2013), 17% (2014), 16% (2015), 14.8% (2016), and 13.8% (2017).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The graph illustrate the percentage of junior high school teachers below 30 years od age in four Brazil, Luxembourg, Japan, and Czech Republic between 2010 to 2017.

Overall, the graph shows slightly fluctuated trends. In Brazil and Czech Republic, the trend is decline gradually, whereas Japan is increase significantly. Besides that, Luxembourg constantly fluctuated around the years.

The Graphic in Brazil and Czech Republic are annually decrease. In Brazil, The percentage is start from 20% to 14% which is above Czech Republic. On the other hand, The share in Czech Republic start at 18% to 10 % with a little fluctuate.

In contrast, the teacher’s percentage in Japan is gradually increase from 9% to 16%. This country is the one and only between others that has increased percentage of secondary school teachers under 30 years of age.

Furthermore, the teachers percentage in Luxembourg has constantly fluctuated around 5%. The value of this country is under other countries.

Word Count: 157

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percentage: 5

czech: 5

republic: 5

brazil: 4

teachers: 3

luxembourg: 3

japan: 3

fluctuated: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, providing an overview of the trends in the graph. However, there are some inaccuracies and a lack of specific data to support the descriptions. The organization is generally clear, but the language could be more precise and sophisticated. To improve, focus on including specific data points to illustrate trends, ensuring accuracy in your descriptions, and using a wider range of vocabulary to express the changes and comparisons.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks a clear structure and logical flow. The overview is too general and doesn't effectively summarize the main trends. The body paragraphs are somewhat disjointed, and the transitions between them are weak. To improve coherence, focus on organizing the information into clear, well-defined paragraphs, each addressing a specific aspect of the graph. Use transition words and phrases to connect ideas and ensure a smooth flow of information. For example, you could group countries with similar trends together and use comparative language to highlight the differences.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks precision. There is some repetition of words like 'fluctuated' and 'percentage.' To enhance lexical resource, try to use a wider range of vocabulary to describe trends and comparisons. For example, instead of 'increase significantly,' you could use 'rose sharply' or 'experienced a substantial increase.' Also, vary your vocabulary to avoid repetition and demonstrate a broader command of the English language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and errors in preposition usage. Sentence structure is also quite simple, limiting the complexity of the analysis. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on using a variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences, and pay close attention to verb tenses and subject-verb agreement. Proofread carefully to identify and correct grammatical errors.

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