Bar Chart

Band 5+: The chart below shows where migrants to Australia came from by region, in 1987 and 1997.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows where migrants to Australia came from by region, in 1987 and 1997.

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The image displays a bar chart comparing data for six regions between 1987 and 1997: Oceania shows 15 in 1987 and 30 in 1997; Europe shows 25 in 1987 and 35 in 1997; Middle East Africa shows 10 in 1987 and 15 in 1997; North East Asia shows 15 in 1987 and 20 in 1997; Rest of Asia shows 20 in 1987 and 15 in 1997; North/South American shows 5 in 1987 and 10 in 1997.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart compares the region where people were from, migrants to Australia between 1987 and 1997.

Overall, the highest number of migrants was in Europe and the number of migrants in North America was the lowest over the 10-year period.

In terms of region, the proportion of migrants in Ocenia was around 18% in 1987, while in 1997 the number of migrants increased slightly about 23%. In Europe, however, migrants reached their highest percentages at around 33%. By contrast, in 1987, Middle East Africa and North east Asia remained completely stable at 15% , whereas migrants grew slightly from at 20% to about 23% in 1997.

For the remaining information, between Rest of Asia and South American, there was a noticable fall in migrants, decreasing from around 22% to just at 5% in 1987. Similarly, in 1997, Rest of Asia and North american experienced the maximum difference, falling gradually around 13% to at 5%.

Word Count: 155

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

migrants: 8

around: 4

number: 3

north: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, but there are inaccuracies in the data presented and some issues with the organization and clarity of the information. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data from the chart and organizing the information into clear, logical paragraphs. Also, pay attention to grammar and vocabulary to ensure clarity and precision in your writing.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report's organization is somewhat unclear, and the flow of information could be improved. The connection between sentences and paragraphs needs strengthening to enhance the overall coherence. Consider using more explicit linking words and phrases to guide the reader through the data. For example, transitions between discussing different regions could be smoother.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate but could be more varied and precise. While the report conveys the basic information, using a wider range of synonyms and more specific terms would enhance the description. For instance, instead of repeatedly using 'number of migrants,' try alternatives like 'proportion of immigrants' or 'influx of people.' Also, ensure that the vocabulary is used accurately and appropriately for the context.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of prepositions. Sentence structure is also somewhat basic, limiting the complexity of the information conveyed. To improve, focus on proofreading carefully for grammatical errors and practicing a wider range of sentence structures.

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