Bar Chart

Band 5+: The chart shows British Emigration to selected destinations between 2004 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make compariesons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The chart shows British Emigration to selected destinations between 2004 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make compariesons where relevant.

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The image shows British emigration to selected destinations from 2004 to 2007: in 2004, Australia 41K, Spain 33K, New Zealand 22K, USA 24K, France 22K; in 2005, Australia 39K, Spain 35K, New Zealand 21K, USA 19K, France 19K; in 2006, Australia 51K, Spain 32K, New Zealand 21K, USA 18K, France 27K; in 2007, Australia 43K, Spain 28K, New Zealand 20K, USA 20K, France 18K.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart illustrates the number of British people who emigrated to five countries: Australia, Spain, New Zealand, USA, and France from 2004 to 2007.

Overall, Australia was the most preferred country by British people. While the USA, and New Zealand were the least chosen.

On average, there were approximately 40 thousand people, who emigrated to Australia, and reached the highest record in 2006 which is over 50 thousand people. In terms of Spain, the number of people who moved to Spain remained unchanged, nearly 35 thousands and dropped by around 5 thousands people in 2007. In France, the highest record was in 2005 which is nearly 30 thousand people.

Between 2004 and 2007, New Zealand’s figures decreased slightly from nearly 25 thousand to over 20 thousand. In 2005, the number of emigrants dropped by 5 thousand and recovered in 2006.

Word Count: 141

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 6

thousand: 6

number: 3

australia: 3

spain: 3

nearly: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main requirements of the task and identifies the primary trends, such as Australia being the most popular destination. However, there are some inaccuracies in data reporting and logical inconsistencies. For example, the report states that the number of people moving to Spain remained unchanged at nearly 35 thousand, but the data shows fluctuations. Additionally, the description of New Zealand's trend (dropping and then recovering) does not align clearly with the provided data. To improve, ensure that all comparisons are supported by accurate data points and that the overview more comprehensively summarizes the general trends across all categories. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, the cohesion is weakened by several sentence fragments and punctuation errors. For instance, the sentence 'While the USA, and New Zealand were the least chosen' is a dependent clause acting as a full sentence, which disrupts the flow. To improve, ensure that subordinate clauses are attached to main clauses and use a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., 'In contrast,' 'Similarly,' or 'Regarding...') to link ideas more smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for describing the trends (e.g., 'emigrated', 'remained unchanged', 'decreased slightly'). However, there is some repetition and slightly awkward phrasing, such as 'reached the highest record' and 'the number of people who moved to Spain'. To reach a higher band, try to use more sophisticated synonyms for 'people' (e.g., 'migrants', 'emigrants', 'individuals') and more precise verbs for trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'declined'). Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical issues that affect the overall quality. There is frequent misuse of commas (e.g., 'approximately 40 thousand people, who emigrated'), and some subject-verb agreement or pluralization issues (e.g., '35 thousands'). Additionally, the use of relative clauses is sometimes clunky. Focus on mastering complex sentence structures and ensuring that punctuation is used to clarify meaning rather than creating fragments. Practice using non-defining relative clauses correctly without unnecessary commas.

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Band 5+: The chart shows British Emigration to selected destinations between 2004 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make compariesons where relevant.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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The chart shows British Emigration to selected destinations between 2004 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make compariesons where relevant.

The chart shows British Emigration to selected destinations between 2004 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make compariesons where relevant.

The chart shows British Emigration to selected destinations between 2004 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make compariesons where relevant.

The chart shows British Emigration to selected destinations between 2004 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make compariesons where relevant.

The chart shows British Emigration to selected destinations between 2004 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make compariesons where relevant.

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