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Band 4+: The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

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The image charts the percentage of the population aged 65 and older spanning ninety years (1940-2040) in Japan, Sweden, and the USA. Japan's population aged 65+ started at 5% in 1940, hit 10% by 1990, and is projected to reach 30% by 2040. Sweden's proportion began at 7% in 1940, reaching 17% by 1990, and anticipating 25% by 2040. The USA's percentage commenced at 8% in 1940, achieving 13% by 1990, and expecting to hit nearly 23% by 2040.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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This chart illustrated the population who are aged 65 and above between 1940 to 2040 and compared them with each other. There are 3 countries information such as Japan, Sweden and USA.

In 1940, the USA population who aged more than 65 was 9% which was better than other two countries. Sweden and USA both population showed gradual growth from 1940 to 1980 but after 1980, USA population was slightly lowered with 1% from 1980 to 2020.

Japan population who aged more than 65 was the lowest in 1940 with only 5% of the human. Moreover, the result lowered with 2% in 1980. After 1980, the population was increasing gradually and rapidly grew afer 2020 to 2040 with 27% of population aged more than 65 years old.

This chart illustrates Japan old people population is more than other two countries result.

Word Count: 141

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

population: 8

other: 3

countries: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report generally addresses the requirements of the task but includes some inaccuracies and omissions. The description of the trends is not always precise, and there are some issues with data reporting. To improve, focus on providing more accurate data and a clearer overall summary of the trends. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and logical flow. The ideas are not well-connected, and the paragraphing is not effective. To improve coherence, use cohesive devices to link sentences and paragraphs, and ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. For example, the report could benefit from an introductory overview, followed by paragraphs detailing trends for each country, and a concluding summary.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive. There is limited use of more sophisticated language to describe the trends and comparisons. To enhance lexical resource, try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to population trends and comparative analysis. For instance, instead of repeatedly using 'population,' consider using synonyms like 'demographic,' 'proportion,' or 'percentage.' Also, use more precise adjectives and adverbs to describe the changes. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward phrasing. These errors significantly impact the clarity and accuracy of the report. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on using a variety of sentence structures correctly and proofread carefully for errors in grammar and punctuation. For example, ensure that verb tenses are consistent and appropriate for the time frame being discussed.

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