Bar Chart

Band 5+: The graph shows the sales of five types items in four different seasons at a departmental store in the US in 2011 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The graph shows the sales of five types items in four different seasons at a departmental store in the US in 2011 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a bar chart titled "Sales of US Department Stores (in US Dollars)" for five item categories across four seasons. In Winter, sales were approximately: Women's clothes 42,000, Men's clothes 29,000, Sports equipment 32,000, Cosmetics 27,000, and Jewellery 20,000. For Spring, the figures were: Women's clothes 61,000, Men's clothes 23,000, Sports equipment 42,000, Cosmetics 23,000, and Jewellery 20,000. In Summer, sales were: Women's clothes 80,000, Men's clothes 35,000, Sports equipment 43,000, Cosmetics 25,000, and Jewellery 28,000. Lastly, Autumn sales were: Women's clothes 110,000, Men's clothes 34,000, Sports equipment 42,000, Cosmetics 53,000, and Jewellery 62,000.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The graph shows the sale of five different types of items in different seasons. In winter the women’s clothes clocked 40000 US dollars. The sports equipment had 30000 usd dollars whereas men’s clothes had 25000usd followed by cosmetics and lastly jewellery with 20000 usd. All this was winter sales.

In Spring women’s clothes rose in sales to 60000usd as well as the sports equipment to 40000usd. We saw a drop in sales of the men’s clothes and cosmetics to 25000usd. As for the jewellery it broke even, it maintained its sales of 20000.

Women’s clothes sales rose again in summer to 80000 usd. We also see a rise to men’s clothes by 15000 usd and also cosmetics by 8000usd and jewellery slightly. Summer was a good season for all items except for sports equipment which dropped by a great magine.

Autum is indeed a good season for the sale of women’s clothing. It had the highest sales of all seasons with sales of 110000 usd followed by jewellery which clocked 60000 usd

Word Count: 172

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

clothes: 6

sales: 6

jewellery: 4

women's: 3

sports: 3

equipment: 3

men's: 3

cosmetics: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main requirements of the task by describing the sales trends across the four seasons. It identifies key trends, such as the significant rise in women's clothing sales and the peak in autumn. However, the response is somewhat repetitive in its structure, often listing data point by point rather than synthesizing the information into more sophisticated comparisons. To improve, try to group data more effectively (e.g., comparing categories that follow similar trends) and use a wider variety of comparative structures. Additionally, ensure that all trends are accurately reflected; for instance, the claim that sports equipment dropped significantly in summer contradicts the data provided.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a chronological structure based on the seasons, which is logical. However, the cohesion is weak due to repetitive sentence structures and a lack of sophisticated linking words. The use of 'We saw' and 'We also see' is somewhat informal for an academic report; it is better to use impersonal constructions (e.g., 'A decrease was observed in...'). Additionally, some transitions between sentences are abrupt, making the flow feel disjointed rather than effortless.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is functional but limited and repetitive. There are several issues with word choice and spelling (e.g., 'magine' instead of 'margin', 'Autum' instead of 'Autumn'). The way currency is expressed is inconsistent and often non-standard (e.g., 'usd dollars', '25000usd', '80000 usd'). To improve, try to use a wider variety of synonyms for 'sales' (e.g., revenue, turnover, figures) and 'rise/fall' (e.g., surged, plummeted, fluctuated, remained stable). Avoid informal phrasing like 'broke even' or 'indeed a good season'. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report relies heavily on simple sentence structures, which limits the grammatical range. There are several errors in punctuation and capitalization (e.g., 'winter' and 'summer' should be capitalized when referring to specific periods in some contexts, though lowercase is acceptable, the lack of commas after introductory phrases is noticeable). There are also issues with sentence construction, such as 'the women's clothes clocked 40000 US dollars', which is slightly awkward. Aim to use more complex sentence structures, such as subordinate clauses, to combine ideas and show relationships between different data points.

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Band 5+: The graph shows the sales of five types items in four different seasons at a departmental store in the US in 2011 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The graph shows the sales of five types items in four different seasons at a departmental store in the US in 2011 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph shows the sales of five types items in four different seasons at a departmental store in the US in 2011 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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