Pie Chart

Band 4+: the pie chart below shows the native languages spoken by students at Cambridge in year 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: the pie chart below shows the native languages spoken by students at Cambridge in year 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image shows a pie chart of the native languages spoken by students at Cambridge College in 2007, detailing English (45%), Hindi (30%), Urdu (13%), Chinese (10%), and French (2%).

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This diagram provides information about present of students who spoke their native languages who studied at Cambridge college in 2007

In total , more of the students spoke English in 2007 but it’s less than half of a total amount of the students . They are also 4 different groups who spoke other languages.

In terms , of pie chart it’s worse considering the 45% of students who’s native language was English a presenting in this pie chart. Moreover the second most spoken language was Hindi with 30% of students who spoke it 2007. It is worth noting that, in total , this two groups have accounted 3-4 of the total .

In contrast ,2 percentage of students who spoke Urdu in Cambridge college which was the less percentage, addition , Chinese language was 10% and the remaining 13% of the students were native French speakers .

In total , about a half of the students were native English speakers, and more then a half spoke 4 different languages

Word Count: 169

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

students: 8

spoke: 6

total: 5

native: 4

english: 3

language: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report identifies some main features but includes inaccuracies and lacks clarity in places. The organization is somewhat present, but the language used contains errors and could be more precise. To improve, focus on accurate data representation, clearer language, and a more structured approach to comparisons.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and logical flow. The ideas are not presented in a coherent manner, and the connections between sentences and paragraphs are weak. Paragraphing is not effectively managed, and the overall structure is difficult to follow. Use cohesive devices more effectively to link ideas and improve the overall flow of the report. Consider organizing the information into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of the pie chart.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is limited and sometimes inaccurate. There are instances of inappropriate word choice and imprecise language. Expand your vocabulary and use more precise language to describe the data. Focus on using synonyms and varied sentence structures to enhance the quality of your writing.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and incorrect use of articles and prepositions. These errors significantly affect the clarity and accuracy of the report. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence structure. Proofread your work carefully to identify and correct errors.

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