Pie Chart

Band 4+: The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

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The image contains three pie charts for the years 1980, 1990, and 2000, showing data for employed, further education, and unemployed categories in percentages for young people in Australia after university. In 1980: employed 60%, further education 10%, unemployed 30%. In 1990: employed 40%, further education 50%, unemployed 10%. In 2000: employed 55%, further education 37%, unemployed 8%.

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The pie charts compare the percentage oh student who chose 3 different ways after completing hight school in Australia between 1980 and 2000.

Overall, the highest percentage of student chose employment in australia after finish hight school, while the percentage of students chose further education was lowest.

In term of choosing, the singnificant percentage chose to do nothing after completing hight school in 1980, at 50%. However, this figure decreased slightly by 13% in 2000, at 37%. Similarly, students chose to further education experienced same trend, falling from 10% to 8% between 1980 and 2000.

For the remaining source, Australia saw a increase the percentage of student who wanted to do jobs after graduation high school from 40% in 1980 to 55% in 2000, a modarate growth at total 15% students over the 20 years, it is was only one lergest figure which followed an upward trend among all the given catagoris.

Word Count: 152

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percentage: 5

chose: 5

after: 4

school: 4

student: 3

hight: 3

australia: 3

students: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report generally addresses the task, but there are inaccuracies in the data reported and some misinterpretations of the pie charts. The writing also contains grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data from the charts and ensure correct grammar and sentence structure.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and logical flow. The information is not presented in a coherent manner, making it difficult to follow the comparisons between the years. Paragraphing is weak, and transitions between ideas are abrupt. To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on structuring the report with a clear introduction, body paragraphs that each address a specific trend or comparison, and a concluding statement. Use transition words and phrases to connect ideas and ensure a smooth flow of information.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is limited and contains inaccuracies. There are instances of incorrect word choice and imprecise language. To enhance lexical resource, broaden your vocabulary related to describing trends and comparisons. Use synonyms and varied expressions to avoid repetition and demonstrate a wider range of language skills. Pay attention to the correct usage of words in context.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and punctuation mistakes. Sentence structure is often awkward and unclear. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and sentence structures. Practice writing and proofreading to identify and correct errors. Consider using grammar resources and seeking feedback from others to improve your writing skills.

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Band 4+: The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

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Answers On The Same Topic:

The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

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