Pie Chart

Band 5+: The pie chart shows the time teenagers spend doing different leisure activities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The pie chart shows the time teenagers spend doing different leisure activities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a pie chart titled 'Common leisure activities for teenagers,' which illustrates the percentage of time spent on various activities. The distribution is as follows: Playing computer games accounts for 34%, Being with friends is 24%, Listening to music and Playing sports are both 12%, Going shopping is 8%, Going dancing is 6%, and Reading books and comics is 4%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The given pie chart illustrates the percentage of teenagers spend in common leisure various activities (Reading books and comics, Going shopping, Being with freinds, Going dancing, Listening to music, and Playing sports).

Overall, the highest percentage of people in common leisure activities for teenagers was in playing computer games. However, the lowest percentage of people was in reading books and comics, as well as listening to music and playing sports were remained same.

For playing computer games in leisure time, 34% of teenagers was played computer games. Moreover, 24% of teenagers were being with friends in leisure period. However, both listening to music and playing sports were 12% teenagers in leisure time.

The teenagers who go to shopping was accounted for 8% in leisure time. Furthermore, 6% of teenagers go for dance in the leisure period. Also, the teenagers who go for reading books and comics was accounted for 4%.

Word Count: 150

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

teenagers: 8

leisure: 7

playing: 5

percentage: 3

books: 3

comics: 3

listening: 3

music: 3

computer: 3

games: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report identifies some main features but includes some inaccuracies and lacks clear organization. To improve, focus on grouping similar data, ensuring accuracy in reported percentages, and using more varied language to describe the data. Also, ensure correct spelling.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates some attempt at organization, but the flow of information is disrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Paragraphing is present but could be used more effectively to group related ideas. To improve coherence, focus on using clear topic sentences for each paragraph and ensuring that transitions between sentences and paragraphs are logical. Pay attention to pronoun references and ensure they are clear and unambiguous.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and somewhat repetitive. There is limited use of more sophisticated language to describe the data. To enhance lexical resource, try to incorporate a wider range of synonyms and more precise vocabulary related to proportions and comparisons. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'percentage,' consider using 'proportion,' 'share,' or 'fraction.' Also, explore using adverbs and adjectives to add detail and nuance to your descriptions. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. These errors significantly impede understanding. To improve grammatical accuracy, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and sentence structures. Review and practice verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles and prepositions. Consider using a grammar checker to identify and correct errors, but always review the suggestions critically to ensure they are appropriate for the context.

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