Letter

Band 6+: You borrowed a piece of equipment (e.g., a lawnmower, a camera) from a neighbor and returned it later than you agreed. Write a letter to your neighbor. In your letter, you should: - apologize for the late return - explain why you couldn't return it on time - explain any damages or problems encountered, if any

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To: Rental Tech

Subject: Late returned item

Hi, this is Nathaly.

I’m sending this letter because I rented a camera last monday for a university project and returned it yesterday with some failures.

First of all, I would like to apologize for the late return. Not to make an excuse but I totally missed the return day due some injuries, which is the reason why it got some scratches. While I was taking pictures of an amazing landscape for my final art project, I accidentally fell over some rocks and for protect the camera by all cost, I put my hand covering it, which caused me a fissure in my left hand, so I had to finish my project with a sling and later on go to the ship store to return the camera.

I really want to make this up and I’m more than committed to pay for the damage caused. Please let me know how can we solve this.

Thank you and I´m looking forward for your response

Sincerely, Nathaly.

Word Count: 172

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

project: 3

return: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the task. The explanation for the delay and the damage is provided, and a willingness to pay for the damage is expressed. However, the response could be improved by ensuring a more logical connection between the points; for instance, the link between the hand injury and the late return is slightly convoluted. Additionally, the tone is somewhat inconsistent - it fluctuates between overly casual ('Hi, this is Nathaly') and formal. To improve, aim for a more professional tone suitable for a letter to a manager, and ensure that the explanation of how the damage occurred is clearly and concisely linked to the reason for the delay.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter follows a logical progression, addressing all three bullet points from the prompt. However, the flow is somewhat disrupted by long, run-on sentences. For example, the section explaining the accident is one very long sentence that tries to connect too many ideas (the landscape, the fall, the hand injury, and the trip to the store) using 'and' and 'so'. To improve, use more varied cohesive devices and break long sentences into smaller, more impactful ones to help the reader follow the narrative more easily.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is functional and allows the message to be understood, but it lacks the sophistication required for higher bands. There are some awkward word choices, such as 'returned it yesterday with some failures' (where 'damage' or 'scratches' would be more appropriate) and 'ship store' (likely a typo for 'shop'). Additionally, 'for protect the camera by all cost' is unidiomatic. Aim to use more precise collocations, such as 'incurring late fees' or 'compensating for the damage'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical errors that affect the professional tone of the letter. Issues include preposition errors ('due some injuries' instead of 'due to some injuries'), incorrect verb forms ('for protect' instead of 'to protect'), and word order issues in indirect questions ('how can we solve this' instead of 'how we can solve this'). While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents a higher score. Focus on mastering complex sentence structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement and correct preposition usage.

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