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Letter

Band 4+: You want to join a local sports club to improve your fitness and meet new people. Write a letter to the club secretary. You should include: - why you want to join the club - what sports you are interested in - any relevant experience you have

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Greetings, dear sports club secretary!

The reason why I text you is to join the club aquire more information about it. I would like to join you because I need to be more active in order to make my portfolio rare. What kind of activities do you have there? Does it have a figure skating or a fotball section as well? The another thing that I want to concern is a schedule and a price. Is your club free or do we need to pay for being a part of it? In what days does your club work and how many people are in football team, if it exists?

With respect

Ali.

Word Count: 112

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Overall Band Score

4
(+/- 0.5)
Vocabulary Complexity:
A1 - Beginner
Aim to use more advanced language.
Grammar Mistakes: N/A
Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

4
The letter addresses the task requirements but includes some irrelevant information and lacks clarity in certain areas. To improve, focus on providing concise and relevant details directly related to the prompts. For example, elaborate on your reasons for wanting to join the club beyond just needing to be more active. Also, ensure the questions are clear and directly related to the activities, cost, and schedule. The letter falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

4
The letter's organization is somewhat unclear, and the flow of ideas could be improved. Consider grouping related questions together and using more formal transitions to guide the reader. For example, you could dedicate a paragraph to your reasons for joining, another to the activities offered, and a final one to the schedule and costs. Using a more formal structure will enhance the letter's clarity.

Lexical Resource

4
The vocabulary used is basic and lacks the precision needed for a formal letter. For instance, using 'text' instead of 'write' is inappropriate. To improve, try to use more specific and varied vocabulary related to sports and club activities. For example, instead of 'What kind of activities do you have there?', you could ask, 'Could you provide details on the range of sporting activities available?' Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4
The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'aquire' should be 'acquire,' and the sentence 'The reason why I text you is to join the club aquire more information about it' is awkwardly phrased. Focus on using correct verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and accurate spelling. Reviewing basic grammar rules and proofreading carefully can help reduce these errors.

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