Letter

Band 7+: You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part time. Write a letter to your boss. In your letter: explain why you want to reduce your working hours say which hours you would like to work describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer

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Dear Mr. Smith,

I hope this letter finds you in great spirits. I am writing to express my enquiry regarding decreasing my working hours at the office. As I have recently been accepted into a master program in the field of biology, I would like to manage my time efficiently to strike a balance between education and my duties. Fortunately, educating in biological subjects brushes up on my skills at company and broaden my horizons to come up with new ideas. Thus, this matter aligns with the ultimate goal we are all looking for.

My mentor asked me to allocate 3 days a week to attend classes. Hence, I will not be able to devote more than 3 days to work. I am optimistic that your assistance and guidance lead to a win-win collaboration.

Thanks for your understanding. I am looking forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,

Mobina Fathi

Word Count: 150

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The letter addresses all three points in the prompt. The explanation for reducing hours, the desired work schedule, and the benefits to the employer are all present. However, the letter could be improved by providing more specific details about the desired working hours. Also, elaborating further on how the studies would benefit the employer would strengthen the response.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally well-organized and the purpose is clear. The progression of ideas is logical, explaining the reason for reduced hours, desired hours, and benefits to the employer. However, the connection between some ideas could be strengthened for smoother flow. For example, elaborating slightly more on how the studies directly translate into benefits for the company would improve coherence.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate and appropriate for the context. Phrases like 'strike a balance' and 'win-win collaboration' are well-used. However, there's room to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and naturally. For instance, instead of 'educating in biological subjects brushes up on my skills at company,' consider a more refined phrasing.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter demonstrates a good command of grammar, with a mix of simple and complex sentences. However, there are a few grammatical errors and phrasing issues that need attention. For example, 'educating in biological subjects brushes up on my skills at company' is grammatically awkward. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and clarity in sentence construction.

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