Advantage And Disadvantage

Band 5+: In some countries, more and more adults are living with their parents after graduating from college, university, or even after finding a job. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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countinued staying with there familys after the age of mainer has incress. This trend has several factors . However, this essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend.

The most important upside of this phenomena is reducing the cost of life. Nowdays living in accommidation individualy cost alot of money, on the other hand, shared-places will healp many citizant to have a comfrtoble life. Another significant benefit is the social communication between paents and sons . Living in the same place make the social boun stronger . According to resarcher: 80% of people that still in same house with there parents will have a strong social bound unlike how live individualy.

However, the trind also carry downsides one of them lack of freedome. People whene they reach old would prefer to have some personal-space so they can do avtivites that sut them. For example, bingo game, having a reading grop, and some sport. Another drowbake they will lose the sence of responsebalty . Relaying on parents will make them more spoiled and whene they face a real-life setotion they will lose control.

In short, while this trend means reducing the cost of life and social communcation with eachothere, it also means lack of freedome and lose the sence of responsebalty. People need to but in consider all the factors before they chose to live with there parents. On the othere hand, parents should gaide there sons sence they were children.

Word Count: 242

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

there: 4

social: 4

parents: 4

people: 3

sence: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of adults living with their parents. A position is presented, but some ideas lack clarity and could be more fully developed. To improve, focus on providing more specific examples and clearer explanations to support your points. Also, pay attention to grammatical accuracy and sentence structure to enhance the overall clarity of your writing. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates some organization, but the flow of ideas is frequently disrupted by grammatical errors and unclear phrasing. Paragraphing is present, but the connections between sentences and ideas within paragraphs need improvement. Transitions between paragraphs could also be smoother. To improve coherence, focus on using clear topic sentences for each paragraph and ensuring that each sentence logically follows from the previous one. Proofreading carefully for grammatical errors will also enhance readability.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary, and there are instances of inaccurate word choice ('upside of this phenomena,' 'social boun'). Some words are also misspelled ('accommidation,' 'comfrtoble,' 'responsebalty'). To improve lexical resource, try to use synonyms and a wider variety of vocabulary related to the topic. Pay attention to spelling and use a dictionary or thesaurus to find more appropriate words. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses ('countinued staying,' 'will healp'), subject-verb agreement issues, incorrect article usage, and awkward sentence structures. These errors significantly impede understanding. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and sentence structures. Practice writing simple sentences and gradually incorporate more complex structures as your confidence grows. Review grammar rules related to verb tenses, articles, and subject-verb agreement. Consider seeking feedback from a language tutor or using online grammar resources to identify and correct errors.

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