Discussion

Band 5+: The world of work is changing rapidly. Working conditions today are not the same as before and people no longer rely on taking one job for life. Discuss the possible cause for these changes and give your suggestions on how people should prepare for work in the future

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A generation ago, When people can usually survive on single job in most of the families only one member worked for whole family and they can survive easily without any hardship. However, now working infrastructure and environment are completely different and employee cannot depend on single job. New technologies and automations are taking people jobs by replacing them in which globalization and recession are the significant factor. This essay will examine this perspective and before concluding try to know the possible causes for this frequent change in employee behavior.

The reason behind that lies in, technology which is changing day by day as we can see everyday something new is coming into the market. Automation and AI machines are replacing human job because they automate most of their tasks which are repetative and required entire team of human. In addition, due to recessions people are incline to work with freelancers which can give them same amount of work you need at feasible amount. For instance, Finance and medicine algorithms now conduct analysis which can be done by artificial intelligence and machines that once required entire teams.

If i want to suggest which can help our people in future, so we have to make some effective changes in every aspect of life and tend to learn new technologies and skills. Like in school we need to arrange proper classes and make syllabus which should be aligned with modern working structure like coding, machine Learning, programming skills. Government and private firm should also start proper training model for their employees so they can learn and up-to-date with upcoming technologies and skills. Moreover, universities should also take their part and update their courses timely so it can matches future job demands easily. For example, artificial intelligence, Machine Learning, and data sciences are the new under graduate and graduate courses which are perfectly align with future job market.

In conclusion, we have to understand this eventually job market is not the same. New technologies and machines are replacing employees role. We have to upgrade our skills and learn new things which are in demand and help us to secure our job.

Word Count: 357

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

which: 9

people: 4

technologies: 4

their: 4

skills: 4

replacing: 3

machines: 3

future: 3

learn: 3

should: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses all parts of the prompt. You have identified causes (technology, automation, and economic factors) and provided suggestions for preparation (educational reform and corporate training). A clear position is maintained throughout the response. To improve your score, focus on the following areas: 1. **Development of Ideas**: While you mention globalization and recession in the introduction, the body paragraph focuses almost exclusively on technology. To achieve a higher score, you should expand on how globalization or economic recessions specifically cause job instability (e.g., outsourcing or companies downsizing). 2. **Clarity and Precision**: Some ideas lack precision. For example, you mention 'changes in employee behavior,' but the prompt asks about changes in the 'world of work' (the market/conditions), not how employees behave. Ensure you are addressing the specific wording of the prompt. 3. **Grammatical Accuracy and Cohesion**: There are several grammatical errors regarding sentence structure and word choice (e.g., 'people are incline to work with freelancers' should be 'companies are inclined to hire freelancers'). Improving your use of cohesive devices and ensuring subject-verb agreement will help the flow of your arguments.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay follows a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing the causes and solutions, and a conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes hindered by awkward phrasing and poor sentence connectivity. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'Consequently', 'As a result') and ensure that each sentence flows naturally into the next. Avoid starting sentences with 'If i want to suggest...' as it is too informal for an academic essay.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is sufficient to convey the main ideas, and there is an attempt to use topic-specific terms like 'automation', 'globalization', and 'machine learning'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choices and repetitive phrasing (e.g., 'new technologies and skills'). To reach a higher band, aim for more sophisticated collocations and avoid repetitive structures. Ensure that words are used in their correct form (e.g., 'repetative' should be 'repetitive', 'incline' should be 'inclined').

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede the reader's understanding. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'it can matches'), article usage (e.g., 'on single job'), and sentence fragments. Punctuation errors, such as unnecessary capitalization and comma splices, are also present. I recommend practicing complex sentence structures and focusing on the accuracy of basic tenses and singular/plural noun forms to ensure clarity.

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