Discussion

Band 7+: You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Some people believe that capital punishment should not be used. Others, however, argue that it should be allowed for the most serious crimes. Discuss both views and give your opinion. You should write at least 250 words.

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Capital punishment is one of the most controversial issues in modern society. While, some people argue that the death penalty should be completely aboilshed, others believe it is necessary for dealing with the most serious crimes. This essay will discuss both perspectives before presenting my own opinion.

Those who oppose capital punishment argue that it violates the fundamental human right to life. From this viewpoint, no government should have the authority to take a person’s life, regardless of the crime commited. Another major concern is the possibility of wrongful convictions. Judicial systems are not infallible, and there have been cases where innocent individuals were sentenced to death and later proven innocent. Since capital punishment is irreversable, any mistake leads to a permanent and tragic injustice.Furthermore, opponents claim that life imprisonment without parole can effectively protect society while still allowing room to correct judicial errors. They also argue that the death penalty does not significantly detr crime, as many serious crimes are commited inpulsively rather than through rational calculation of consequences.

On the other hand, supporters of capital punishment beleive it is jusitifed response to extremely serious crimes such as terrorism ro premediated murder. They argue that the punishment fits the crime and provides jusitce for victims and their families. For some, knowing that the offenders has received the ultimate punishment offers a sense of closure. In addition,advocates claim that punishment can act as a strong deterrent, discouraging potential criminals from commiting the most severe offenses.

In my opinion, although the desire for justice and deterrence is understandable, capital punishment should not be used. The risk of executing innocent people and the ethical concern of taking a human life outweigh the potential benefits. A humane and fair justice system should focus on punishment that protects society while respecting human rights. Therefore , life imprisonment, without parole is a more appropriate alternative for the most serious crime.

In conclusion,I firmly believe that abloishing capital punishment is the better choice for a just and civilized society.

Word Count: 333

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

punishment: 10

capital: 6

society: 4

argue: 4

should: 4

serious: 4

while: 3

death: 3

crimes: 3

human: 3

crime: 3

innocent: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay fully addresses the prompt, presenting a clear and well-developed position on capital punishment. Ideas are relevant, extended, and well-supported with logical reasoning and examples. The essay demonstrates a comprehensive understanding of the topic and presents a balanced discussion of both sides before arriving at a well-reasoned conclusion. Occasional omissions or lapses are acceptable at this level.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay presents a clear and logical argument, discussing both sides of the issue and providing a well-defined opinion. The structure is generally sound, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, there are instances where the transitions between ideas could be smoother to enhance the overall flow. For example, in the second paragraph, elaborating further on the connection between wrongful convictions and the irreversibility of capital punishment would strengthen the argument. Similarly, in the third paragraph, providing specific examples of serious crimes or elaborating on the sense of closure for victims' families could add more depth. Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and that the connections between sentences are explicit.

Lexical Resource

The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, using appropriate terms related to the topic of capital punishment. Words like 'abolished,' 'irreversible,' 'deterrent,' and 'premeditated' are used effectively. However, there are opportunities to enhance the sophistication of the language further. For instance, instead of 'dealing with the most serious crimes,' consider using a more nuanced phrase like 'addressing heinous offenses.' Also, vary the sentence structure to avoid repetition and enhance readability. Explore synonyms for commonly used words to add depth to your writing. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay demonstrates a good command of grammar with a variety of sentence structures. Most sentences are clear and grammatically correct. However, there are a few minor errors that need attention. For example, 'commited' should be 'committed,' and 'jusitifed' should be 'justified.' Additionally, ensure correct subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage throughout the essay. Proofreading carefully for these small errors can significantly improve the overall impression. Pay close attention to punctuation, particularly commas and apostrophes, to avoid ambiguity.

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