Letter

Band 6+: You signed up for a course at a local community center, but now you need to withdraw for unforeseen circumstances. Write a letter to the course administrator explaining your situation. You should include details about: - stating the course name and dates you were enrolled - explaining the reason for your withdrawal - requesting information about a possible refund or credit.

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Good afternoon,

I hope this message finds you well. I would like to apologize in advance. Unfortunately I have to withdraw from the course due to my personal reasons. There is a need in my presnce on a family occasion that I cannot postpone or skip, which will take place at the same time with a course. It is going to be in other country, where I will have to stay for a longer time, so I won’t be able to attend your course physically. Because of that I would like to know if there is a possibility to withdraw next week on Monday? Untill that time, I am still able to attend the classes. As only half of the course were passed by me, is it possible to refund the amount of money of another part of the course? If this variant is not suitable for you, is there any possibility to refund left money according to the center’s policy? Thank you for your time and looking forward to your answer.

Best regards,

Zhuldyz

Word Count: 175

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

course: 4

there: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter adequately addresses all the requirements of the task, including the reason for withdrawal, the desired withdrawal date, and a request for a refund. However, there are some minor lapses in clarity and formality. To improve, focus on using more precise language and maintaining a consistently formal tone throughout the letter. For example, instead of "There is a need in my presnce on a family occasion", you could write "I must attend an unavoidable family event". Also, ensure that your requests are clearly and directly stated.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally coherent, but the organization could be improved for better flow. Consider dedicating a paragraph to each of the points mentioned in the instructions: the reason for withdrawal, the date of withdrawal, and the refund request. This will make the letter easier to follow. Also, avoid abrupt transitions between ideas.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement. Using more precise and varied vocabulary could enhance the letter's impact. For example, instead of 'There is a need in my presnce on a family occasion,' you could say 'I am required to attend an unavoidable family event.' Also, avoid wordiness.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains grammatical errors that affect clarity. Focus on improving sentence structure and accuracy in verb tense usage. For example, 'As only half of the course were passed by me' should be 'As I have only completed half of the course'. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and correct use of prepositions.

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