Letter

Band 5+: You are a member of a local community center. You noticed some equipment that isn't working. This is preventing the community from fully engaging in the center's activities. Write a letter to the director of the community center. In the letter, you should include: - what is broken - how this impacts the community - what you recomend they do to fix it

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Dear director of the commutity center, I am writing to complain about the issues in terms of using the equipment, which is causing inconvenience towards the community.

The exersizing machines such as:

treadmils

the rowing machine

stationary bicycle

and the leg press machine have been reported to us as broken, and other members have been saying how this makes it harder for them to work on the community center.

many members come by not to just spend time or do their tasks in the coworking zone, but also to work out and the amount of broken machines has been causing minor problems between the visitors. The problems therefore create discomfort for others and it has a big impac6t on our community center.

I kindly ask you to pay attention to these issues and my proposed solutions are to close the community center for a day or two in order to switch the old equipment with the new ones and open the doors for the members again.

Word Count: 166

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

members: 3

community: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter adequately addresses the task by identifying the broken equipment, explaining its impact on the community, and suggesting a solution. However, the letter could benefit from more specific details and a more formal tone. For example, elaborating on the types of problems caused between visitors and providing a more detailed plan for replacing the equipment would strengthen the response. Additionally, proofreading for minor grammatical errors and typos would enhance clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization is somewhat unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the connection between broken equipment and community impact isn't smoothly established. The transition between identifying the broken equipment and explaining its impact could be clearer. Consider using more explicit transition words and phrases to guide the reader through your points. For example, you could start the second paragraph with a phrase like, 'This breakdown of equipment significantly affects our community because...' This will help to create a more logical flow of ideas.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. For instance, instead of saying 'causing inconvenience,' you could use more specific phrases like 'hindering fitness routines' or 'limiting recreational opportunities.' Also, the term 'minor problems' is vague; specifying the nature of these problems would enhance the letter. Try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to express your points more effectively.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, the first paragraph has issues with sentence structure and word choice ('issues in terms of using the equipment'). The second paragraph includes a list that isn't properly formatted and contains run-on sentences. The third paragraph has a typo ('impac6t') and awkward phrasing. To improve, focus on constructing clear, grammatically correct sentences and proofread carefully for errors. Pay attention to punctuation, subject-verb agreement, and correct word usage.

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