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Band 7+: The charts show the online sales for retail sectors in a South American country in 2009 and 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: The charts show the online sales for retail sectors in a South American country in 2009 and 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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The image presents two pie charts detailing online sales distribution by category for 2009 and 2019; in 2009, travel constituted 38%, clothes 26%, music/film 20%, books 16%; in 2019, travel comprised 29%, clothes 15%, music/film 33%, books 23%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The given pie charts demonstrate the differences between online sales in a South American country in terms of commercial sectors (travel, clothes, music/film and books) in 2009 and 2019. Units are measured with percentage.

Overall, it can be seen that the percentages of travel and clothes witnessed a downward trend, whereas music/film and books had an upward trend in two periods of time mentioned above.

To begin with, the most noticeable result can be seen in the rate of music/film as there was a considerable growth from 20% to 33% between 2009 and 2019. In 2009, the proportion of books stood at 16% after a decade, it increased moderately to 23%.

In contrast, the figure of travel was 38% in 2009, but it decreased gradually by almost 10 % in 2019. When it comes to the portion of clothes, there was a considerable descent from 26% to 15% over the two periods under discussion.

Word Count: 154

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Overall Band Score

7.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

clothes: 3

music/film: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task, providing a clear and accurate overview of the data presented in the pie charts. The analysis is well-organized, with a clear introduction, overview, and detailed paragraphs. The report demonstrates a strong understanding of the data and effectively communicates the key trends and changes between 2009 and 2019. The language used is precise and appropriate for the task.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally well-organized with a clear structure, including an introduction, overview, and detailed paragraphs. The information is presented logically, and the use of cohesive devices is adequate. To improve coherence and cohesion, consider varying the sentence structure and using a wider range of linking words to enhance the flow of ideas. For instance, in the second paragraph, you could add a sentence summarizing the main trends before diving into the specifics.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, using terms like 'witnessed a downward trend,' 'considerable growth,' and 'increased moderately.' To further enhance the lexical resource, try to incorporate more precise and sophisticated vocabulary related to sales and trends. For example, instead of 'downward trend,' you could use 'decline' or 'decrease.' Also, ensure that the vocabulary is used accurately and appropriately throughout the report. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a good command of grammar with a variety of sentence structures. There are only a few minor errors. To improve further, pay close attention to the accuracy of prepositions and articles, and ensure that verb tenses are consistent throughout the report. Proofreading carefully can help catch these small errors.

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