Pie Chart

Band 8+: The pie charts below show the age groups of the users on different social media platforms in Australia in 2011.

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The image displays three pie charts comparing favorite social media channels for the years 2011, 2012, and 2013; 2011: Facebook 59%, Twitter 21%, LinkedIn 10%, Google+ 5%, Pinterest 5%; 2012: Facebook 49%, Twitter 23%, LinkedIn 12%, Google+ 10%, Pinterest 6%; 2013: Facebook 38%, Twitter 25%, LinkedIn 15%, Google+ 14%, Pinterest 8%.

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The three pie charts illustrate users’ favourite social-networking platforms- in 2011, 2013, and 2013.

Overall, it is clear that Facebook was the dominant platform throughout the period even though its popularity slightly decreased, while the proportion of users choosing other sites such as Twitter and Google Plus rose.

Delving into the details, in 2011 Facebook accounted for nearly 60 percent of users’ preferences, while Twitter and LinkedIn made up 21 and 10 percent respectively. Pinterest and Google Plus were the least favoured both at 5%. By 2012, Facebook had fallen to 49 percent, whereas Twitter grew slightly to 23 percent and LinkedIn to 12 percent accordingly.

By 2013, Facebook’s popularity had dropped sharply to 38 percent, making Twitter the second-most popular site with 25 percent, followed by LinkedIn at 15 percent. Google Plus doubled from 6 to 14 percent, Pinterest also increased slightly to 8%.

Word Count: 145

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percent: 9

twitter: 4

facebook: 3

slightly: 3

google: 3

linkedin: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively summarizes the main trends and provides relevant details from the pie charts. The overall structure is clear, with a good introduction, overview, and detailed paragraphs. To further improve, ensure that all significant data points are mentioned and that the relationships between the data are clearly articulated. Also, double-check the accuracy of the data cited to avoid minor errors. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is well-organized and easy to follow. The information is presented logically, and the paragraphing is effective. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are generally smooth, contributing to the overall coherence of the report. To further enhance coherence, consider using more varied cohesive devices to link ideas, although the current level is already quite strong.

Lexical Resource

A good range of vocabulary is used accurately and appropriately. The language used to describe the trends and proportions is effective. To achieve a higher score, aim for even more sophisticated and nuanced vocabulary choices where possible. For example, instead of 'popularity had dropped sharply,' consider alternatives like 'experienced a significant decline' or 'underwent a substantial reduction in popularity.' Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a wide range of grammatical structures used with flexibility and control. Grammar and punctuation are accurate throughout. The minor errors do not detract from the overall clarity and effectiveness of the report. The grammatical accuracy is a strong point of this report.

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