Table

Band 6+: The table below shows the proportions of pupils attending four secondary school types between 2000 and 2009. Summarize the information and compare where relevant, by selecting and reporting the key features. You should write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: The table below shows the proportions of pupils attending four secondary school types between 2000 and 2009. Summarize the information and compare where relevant, by selecting and reporting the key features. You should write at least 150 words.

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The image displays a table titled 'Secondary School Attendance' showing the proportions of pupils at four school types for the years 2000, 2005, and 2009. Specialist Schools attendance was 12% in 2000, 11% in 2005, and 10% in 2009. Grammar Schools attendance was 24% in 2000, 19% in 2005, and 12% in 2009. Voluntary-controlled Schools attendance was 52% in 2000, 38% in 2005, and 20% in 2009. Community Schools attendance was 12% in 2000, 32% in 2005, and 58% in 2009.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The table illustrates the percentage of students who attended four secondary school types between 2000 until 2009.

Overall, it can be seen that community school has a significant increase in 2000 until 2009, while voluntary-controlled school experienced a sharp decrease.

Regarding voluntary-controlled school, we can see that there was a 22% fall, running 52% to 20% with most pupils attending this school in 2005. Similarly, grammar school as well witnessed a decline but with less drop, falling from 24% to 12% ( a half fall ). Turning to specialist school we can see a similar pattern here, where the number remained at 12% in 2000 before decreasing by 1% in 2005 and 2009 each, to finish the period with lowest figure shown on the chart.

Looking from community school, we can notice that the trand significantly reversed over the period. Accounted at 12% in 2000, the number than had a four-fold rise to 58% at the period end, making it the largest proportion shown on the table.

Word Count: 167

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

school: 8

period: 3

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Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task, presenting the main trends and changes in school attendance. The description of the data is generally clear and accurate, although there's a minor inaccuracy regarding the year with the most pupils attending voluntary-controlled schools. To improve, ensure complete accuracy in data reporting and consider a more sophisticated structure that groups similar trends together for enhanced coherence.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate level of coherence and cohesion, but there are areas for improvement. The overall structure is clear, with an introduction, overview, and detailed paragraphs. However, the transitions between sentences and ideas could be smoother. For instance, the shift from discussing voluntary-controlled schools to grammar schools could be more clearly linked. Paragraphing is generally acceptable, but consider grouping similar trends together more explicitly. To enhance cohesion, use a wider range of cohesive devices and ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-defined aspect of the data.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe the data, including terms like 'significant increase,' 'sharp decrease,' and 'witnessed a decline.' However, there's room to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary to enhance the description. For example, instead of 'a half fall,' you could use 'halved' or 'decreased by 50%.' Also, ensure that vocabulary is used precisely and appropriately throughout the report. Varying your word choice and using more precise language will improve the overall quality.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a reasonable command of grammar, but there are noticeable errors that affect clarity. For example, 'running 52% to 20% with most pupils attending this school in 2005' is grammatically awkward and unclear. Similarly, 'the number than had a four-fold rise' contains a typo ('than' should be 'then') and could be phrased more elegantly. Focus on improving sentence structure and ensuring correct use of prepositions, articles, and verb tenses. Proofreading carefully to eliminate these errors will significantly enhance the report's grammatical accuracy.

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