Letter

Band 7+: You recently purchased a new appliance from an online retailer, but it arrived damaged. Write a letter to the customer service department of the online retailer. In your letter, you should include: - Details of the appliance you purchased (model number, date of purchase). - A description of the damage. - What action you would like them to take (e.g., replacement, refund).

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Dear Sir,

I am writing you about my recent purchase from your online store. On Monday, the 28th of April, I ordered the recently released iPhone 17 Pro Max, in a metallic grey colour, with an order number of ABC12345.

The product arrived yesterday with a very visible dent on the base and a cracked screen. Unfortunately, I must say that I am utterly disappointed with the condition of my product. I can not accept the device in such condition because the package was handled poorly during transit, thus leading to these problems.

I would like to demand that you process a refund as soon as possible. Also, to prevent this from happening again in the future, I’ll suggest you label fragile as delicate. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Yours Sincerely,

Ajoku Peter

Word Count: 136

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses all requirements of the task, providing necessary details about the damaged product, order information, and desired action. The tone is suitable for a formal complaint. To further enhance the response, consider adding a specific timeframe for the requested refund to create a sense of urgency. The letter falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is well-organized and easy to follow. The paragraphing is logical, and the information is presented in a clear sequence. To enhance coherence, consider adding transition phrases to smoothly connect ideas between sentences and paragraphs. For example, in the second paragraph, you could add a phrase like 'Upon closer inspection' to introduce the description of the damage.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is appropriate for the task. To further enhance your lexical resource, try incorporating more varied and specific vocabulary related to describing damage and expressing dissatisfaction. For instance, instead of 'very visible dent,' you could use 'prominent dent.' Also, consider using synonyms for words like 'demand' to show a wider range of language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter demonstrates a good command of grammar with only minor errors. Pay attention to sentence structure and word choice to improve accuracy. For example, rephrasing 'I can not accept the device in such condition because the package was handled poorly during transit, thus leading to these problems' to something like 'I cannot accept the device in this condition, as it appears the package was handled poorly during transit, leading to these damages' would improve clarity and grammatical correctness.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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Lexical Resource

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