Discussion

Band 6+: Some think that people should not change their jobs while others think they should because it brings advantages for themselves, company and society. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

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Some people believe that staying in one type of job all life it should be the best option, while others argue that changing jobs from time to time is more beneficial. This essay will discuss both views before presenting my own opinion.

On the other hand, a siginificant benefits standing in the same job can give a lot of different options for employees. Employees who stay with one company for a long time often enjoy a steady income, long-term benefits such as extra money, pensions, and clear career progression. In addition, the crucial companies more prefer choose ”old” empoyeers who work in this job more than 10-15 years because it would be a slighty easily trust the number of imperative information for this type of people.

On the opossite, changing jobs preriodically offers opportunity for personal and proffesional growth. By moving between different positions, people can develop in exactly new way and feel every time some type of challenge. Furthemore, job changes can prevent boredom and burnout, helping employees stay motivated and satisfied. Nowadays, 40% of people in USA choose changing jobs every year because this option gives feeling for people fully freedom.

In my opinion, our generation need try both ways because job stability has its advantages, changing jobs from time to time is more beneficial in the modern world. The rapid development of technology and industries means that live is changing so fast and people also need been more flexiable.

In conclusion, while staying in one job provides security and expertise, changing jobs allows individuals to grow and remain competitive. Only people need choose which side is more successful for their future live’s.

Word Count: 275

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 6

changing: 6

employees: 3

choose: 3

because: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt, discussing both views and providing an opinion. The ideas are relevant, but there are some areas where the supporting details could be more focused and precise. To improve, ensure each point is clearly linked back to the main argument and provide more specific examples to strengthen your claims. Also, pay attention to grammatical accuracy and word choice to enhance clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates an adequate attempt to discuss both views and present an opinion. However, the organization could be improved for better flow. Transitions between ideas are sometimes abrupt, and the connection between sentences within paragraphs could be strengthened. For example, in the second paragraph, the link between 'steady income' and 'companies preferring old employees' is not immediately clear and requires further explanation. Consider using more cohesive devices to guide the reader through your argument.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a range of vocabulary, but there are instances of imprecise word choice and awkward phrasing. For example, 'siginificant benefits standing in the same job' and 'crucial companies more prefer choose' are not natural expressions. To improve, focus on using more precise and idiomatic language. Pay attention to collocations and consider using a wider range of synonyms to express your ideas more effectively. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains a number of grammatical errors that affect clarity. These include issues with verb tense ('staying in one type of job all life it should be'), subject-verb agreement ('benefits standing'), article usage ('a siginificant benefits'), and sentence structure. There are also errors in spelling ('empoyeers', 'preriodically', 'flexiable'). To improve, carefully proofread your work for grammatical errors and focus on using a variety of sentence structures correctly. Practice using different verb tenses and pay attention to the rules of article usage.

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Lexical Resource

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