Advantage And Disadvantage

Band 4+: You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

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There is no denying the fact that some students live and study in same countries while the other students study in another city. this essay will discuss from both view that In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study,whereas in other countries students attend university in another city.

To begin with, there are many students perfer live and study in same countries and it depends on a lot of reasons. Firstly, many students work and stady in same time and this it is hard from them to do in another city.In other words, the main reason is the family life of a student. For example, if his father or mother dies and he is the only person in the family, he will not be able to study in another city.In addition, the other reason is students perfer to live in same countries next to his friends and family, because he cannot live alone in another city due to his feelings of depression and sadness.

In term of there are many students prefer study in another city, The students will take experience life in another city alone, where they will cook, sleep, wash thier clothes and do many other things in a city far from their families.For example, I study in another city and this things I do it alone.

In conclusion, there are many reason that students prefer live and study in same contries.It is also true that some students prefer study in another city, in my opinion i see that study in another city is bad idea because you will feel tried and sadness.

Word Count: 271

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

students: 11

another: 10

study: 9

countries: 5

other: 5

there: 4

family: 4

reason: 3

prefer: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt by discussing both sides of the argument. However, the development of ideas is limited and not always clear, with some repetition. The essay would benefit from more specific examples and a clearer, more focused discussion of the advantages and disadvantages. To improve, focus on developing each point more fully with supporting evidence and examples, and ensure a clear and logical flow of ideas throughout the essay.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay's structure is somewhat unclear, and the flow of ideas is often disrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. The introduction attempts to outline the essay's scope, but it lacks a clear thesis statement. The body paragraphs present reasons for both sides of the argument, but the connections between ideas are not always logical or well-explained. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are weak, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. The conclusion summarizes the main points but introduces a new opinion without sufficient support. To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on developing a clear thesis statement, using transitions effectively, and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and supporting evidence.

Lexical Resource

The essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary, with some inaccuracies in word choice and usage. There is some repetition of simple words and phrases, which affects the overall quality of the writing. To enhance lexical resource, try to use a wider range of vocabulary related to the topic, including synonyms and more precise terms. Pay attention to collocations and idiomatic expressions to make your writing sound more natural and fluent. Review and correct any errors in word choice and usage to ensure accuracy. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence structure. These errors significantly impede the reader's understanding and detract from the overall quality of the writing. The range of grammatical structures used is limited, and there is a lack of complex sentence constructions. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction. Review and correct errors in your writing, and seek feedback from a teacher or tutor to identify areas for improvement.

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