Pie Chart

Band 6+: The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

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The image contains three pie charts for the years 1980, 1990, and 2000, showing data for employed, further education, and unemployed categories in percentages for young people in Australia after university. In 1980: employed 60%, further education 10%, unemployed 30%. In 1990: employed 40%, further education 50%, unemployed 10%. In 2000: employed 55%, further education 37%, unemployed 8%.

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The given charts demonstrate the proportions of secondary school graduates’ actions in Australia in the years 1980, 1990, and 2000.

In general, most young people started working after leaving their schools in all three periods. Further education was also preferable in some years more than employment, whereas almost the same indices were experienced for unemployment.

Turning to the rates of working graduates, the highest proportion was shown in 2000, accounting for 55%. It stayed the most popular variant in 1990 as well and formed a half of all young people. However, in 1980 at the figure 40%, it gave up to further education, which accounted for one-second of the proportion. In contrast, the rest of the periods showed lower results for graduates continuing their studies, building up 38% for 1990 and 37% for 2000 respectively. Unemployment indices were quite low, but the lowest percentage was given by the year 2000 at 8%, then 1980 at 10% followed it, and the highest rate comparatively for unemployed youth was in 1990 at the figure 12%.

Word Count: 173

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The report covers the main trends and provides relevant data from the pie charts. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g., stating the highest proportion of working graduates was in 2000 at 55% when it was 60% in 1980, and misreporting some other percentages). Also, the writing could be more concise and accurate. To improve, ensure all data cited is accurate and proofread carefully. Focus on making clearer comparisons between the years and avoid unnecessary repetition.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report presents the information in a generally logical order, but the flow could be improved. The transitions between sentences and ideas are not always smooth, making it slightly difficult to follow the comparisons being made. Consider using more explicit transition words and phrases to guide the reader through the data. Paragraphing is adequate but could be more effective with a clearer topic sentence in each paragraph.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe the data, but there are instances where the word choice could be more precise. For example, using 'indices' is not the most natural way to refer to unemployment rates. Try to use more specific and common vocabulary related to trends and proportions. Overall, the vocabulary is adequate, but refining word choices would enhance the clarity and impact of the report.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are some grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'Turning to the rates of working graduates, the highest proportion was shown in 2000, accounting for 55%.' could be rephrased for better accuracy. Pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and accurate use of prepositions. Proofreading carefully for these errors will improve the overall grammatical accuracy.

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Band 6+: The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

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Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

The pie charts below give information about what young people in Australia did after leaving Secondary school in 1980, 1990 and 2000. Summarize the information for a University lecturer. Make comparisons where relevent

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