Opinion

Band 4+: The graph below shows the number of overseas visitors to three different areas in a European country between 1987 and 2007 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The given pie chart illustrates the ratio of domestic speakers of various languages in Canada over two decades.

It is evident from the information provided that English remains the most popular tongue spoken by the people of Canada, followed by French and Non-Official lingos.

In the year 1996, English was the mother tongue of 60% of citizens followed by French at 23% and 17% of people preferred non-official dialects. However, in the year,2006 the percentage of English-speaking individuals fell marginally by 2%, whereas the number of unofficial speakers surged by 3% and accounted for 20%. Also, there was a negligible change in French as the preferred vocal language and the percentile was 22% after a decline of 1%.

In the year 2016, unofficial language speakers increased further and raised to 22% while there was a 1% fall off in the French cognates along with English ones which had 21% and 57% users, respectively.

Word Count: 153

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

french: 4

speakers: 3

english: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay provides a good overview of the main features of the pie charts and makes relevant comparisons between the years. The information is accurately summarized, and the main trends are clearly presented. However, to improve the task response score, it would be beneficial to include a concluding sentence that summarizes the overall trend observed in the data. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay is generally well-organized and coherent. The ideas are presented in a logical sequence, and the comparisons between the years are clearly articulated. However, to enhance coherence and cohesion, consider using more linking words and phrases to connect the sentences and paragraphs more effectively. Additionally, the introduction could be expanded to provide a clearer overview of the information presented.

Lexical Resource

The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, and the language used is generally accurate. There is evidence of an attempt to use a variety of vocabulary related to languages and percentages. To improve lexical resource, consider incorporating more specific and varied vocabulary related to language diversity and demographic changes. Additionally, aim to use more precise and sophisticated lexical choices to enhance the overall quality of the essay.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay exhibits a wide range of grammatical structures, and the majority of the sentences are accurately constructed. However, there are some instances of grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that slightly affect the overall fluency and coherence of the essay. To enhance grammatical range and accuracy, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and sentence structure. Additionally, aim for more varied sentence structures to further showcase grammatical flexibility.

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