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Letter

Band 5+: You recently purchased a faulty electronic device from an online retailer. Write a letter to the customer service department of the online retailer to complain about the device. You should include details about: - The product and date of purchase - A description of the fault - What action you would like the retailer to take.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Good morning,

I’m writing to you because of the smartphone that i received from this online retainer and I sadly received it with a lot of inconveniences.

First of all, I ordered a smartphone 2 months ago ( the 3rd of July ) my order number was 864379 and received it yesterday while I had to receive it three weeks ago and I assume that its a really huge inconvenience I think that is inadmissible and a huge mistake for a recognised site to do, because I gave it my trust and I was not ready for this kind disappointment. I honestly think that you should improve the quality of your work. Receiving a phone with a broken glass, and a barely working touch screen is surprising and I’m pretty sure that I’m not the first one to complain about this.

I’m really disappointed and I hope that you can give me my money back and take your defitues phone so I could order a new one in another site.

Word Count: 170

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

received: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses the requirements of the task, but some irrelevant or inaccurate information is present. The tone is somewhat emotional rather than professional. To improve, focus on providing clear and concise details about the defects and desired resolution, while maintaining a polite and professional tone.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization could be improved for better clarity. Consider dedicating separate paragraphs to each key point: the defects, order details, and desired resolution. Transition words could also be used to link ideas more smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is generally adequate, but there's room to enhance it with more precise and formal language. For instance, instead of 'a lot of inconveniences,' you could say 'several defects.' Varying your word choice can make the letter sound more professional.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are present and impact the clarity of the message. Focus on correct tense usage, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. Sentence structure could also be varied to improve readability.

Answers On The Same Topic:

You recently purchased a faulty electronic device from an online retailer. Write a letter to the customer service department of the online retailer to complain about the device. You should include details about: – The product and date of purchase – A description of the fault – What action you would like the retailer to take.

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Band 8+

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Band 7+

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Band 6+

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Band 7+

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Band 7+

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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Task Response

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