Opinion

Band 5+: Writing Task 2 You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

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Note: Both the topic and the essay were created by one of our users.

In contemporary society, the topic of medical care has sparked a lot of discussion. While some People have to pay for their medical care in a lot of countries. Others believe that government should provide health care service for their people for free. In my opinion, I strongly agree with this view, and I am gonna present two main arguments to support my stance.

To begin with, the primary reason for my agreements with free medical care service is the hight cost of medical care. This is clearly shows that not everyone can afford their medical care. For example a regular person with no salairy, he doesn’t have a job because of his illness, how could he pay for his treatment ?

Furthermore, an other compelling reason is taxes. People already pay a lot for their mounthly taxes, and for their insurance. So why he need to pay more for his medical care ? Governement take always taxes from their people, so with that money they should provide free treathement for their own. People help the governement economy by working and paying taxes of their food and houses and With that money they can built new hospitals and open jobs for several doctors and pay them.

In conclusion, based in the two argumentd mentioned, i maintain my belief that medical care should be a free service offered from the governement. This solution have a significant benefits to the people wish will provide help and care. And a big hope for their future.

Word Count: 252

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

their: 9

medical: 7

people: 6

taxes: 4

should: 3

provide: 3

service: 3

governement: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt and presents a clear position. The main ideas are relevant but lack clarity and sufficient development. For improvement, provide more specific examples and elaborate on the reasoning behind your arguments. Focus on providing more concrete evidence to support your claims and ensure a clearer, more logical flow of ideas.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay's organization is somewhat clear, but the flow of ideas could be improved. The introduction states the opinion, and the conclusion restates it, but the body paragraphs lack clear transitions and development. For example, the connection between the high cost of medical care and the need for free service isn't fully elaborated. The second paragraph introduces taxes but doesn't clearly link it to the initial point about affordability. To improve coherence, use clearer topic sentences, transitional phrases, and ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed idea. Consider using cohesive devices more effectively to guide the reader through your argument.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is relatively basic and lacks precision. There are instances of informal language ('gonna') and some awkward phrasing ('hight cost', 'salairy', 'take always taxes'). To enhance lexical resource, try to use a wider range of vocabulary that is more specific and academic. Focus on using synonyms and paraphrasing to express ideas in a more sophisticated manner. Pay attention to collocations and ensure that the words you use fit the context appropriately. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. These include incorrect verb tenses ('clearly shows'), subject-verb agreement issues ('Governement take'), and incorrect word forms ('treathement'). Sentence structure is also quite simple, limiting the complexity of the arguments presented. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on using a variety of sentence structures (e.g., complex sentences, compound sentences) and ensure that you have a solid understanding of basic grammar rules. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and word choice.

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